Tips from Chandler family law attorney

Children do not choose divorce, yet they are often left to navigate the consequences of a decision made by the adults in their lives. Changes to where they live, their daily routines, how they spend time with each parent, and their family relationships can create uncertainty and make it difficult for them to understand what their future may look like.

At Shaffer Family Law, we have seen firsthand how the effects of divorce can extend beyond the spouses we represent, affecting the children who must adjust to a new family dynamic. While every child responds to divorce differently, understanding its potential impact can help parents recognize their children’s needs and provide meaningful support as they transition into this new chapter.

Common Effects of Divorce on Children

• Emotional Changes: Divorce can trigger a wide range of emotions in children, including sadness, anger, confusion, anxiety, and even guilt. Some mistakenly believe they are responsible for their parents’ separation or wonder whether they could have done something to prevent it. Others worry about whether their parents will continue to love them and remain present in their lives.
• Behavior Problems: Children can express their feelings through behavioral changes rather than words. Some act out at home or school, while others become withdrawn or irritable. Parents might also notice differences in their child’s sleep patterns, mood, appetite, social interactions, or academic performance.
• Trust and Relationship Challenges: Parents are often a child’s first experience of love. When that sense of security is disrupted, it can also influence how children understand trust and stability and how they build relationships.
• Taking on Adult Responsibilities: Older children can feel accountable for their family’s well-being or be expected to take on responsibilities beyond what is appropriate for their age. They may help care for younger siblings, manage additional household tasks, or provide emotional support to a parent struggling.
• Difficulty Adjusting to New Routines: Divorce can introduce many changes to a child’s life in a short period of time. They need to adapt to a new home, different rules, revised schedules, a new school, or shifts in their family dynamics. This can be overwhelming and disrupt the routines and consistency they have relied on.
• Feeling Caught in the Middle: Children can find themselves caught between their parents when one parent vents about the other or shares frustrations about the challenges they are facing. This can pressure them to take sides, lead to resentment toward one or both parents, or draw them into their parents’ disagreements more than they should.
• Risky Behavior: Some children turn to risky behaviors as a way to cope with the emotional challenges that can follow the end of their parents’ marriage. They might seek attention, validation, or acceptance from others, particularly when they lack connection or support at home. In some cases, teenagers turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as substance use, to avoid or numb difficult emotions.

Protect Your Child’s Best Interests with Shaffer Family Law

Parents can play an important role in minimizing these effects. Reassuring their children that they are not responsible for the separation and reminding them that they will continue to be loved and cared for can provide comfort during an uncertain time. Because while a marriage may end, the role of a parent does not.

When parents can prioritize their children’s needs and work toward a healthy co-parenting relationship, they can provide greater stability as they adjust to their new circumstances. However, we understand that reaching this kind of relationship is not always possible.

At Shaffer Family Law, we recognize that divorce is difficult, and when children are involved, the process can become even more personal and emotionally challenging. Our Arizona attorneys can help you navigate the complex legal issues that can arise during the process, including parenting time and legal decision-making, property division and other matters that may affect your family. We work to protect your parental rights while pursuing a resolution that supports your interests and your children’s well-being.

When you’re ready to move forward, call us at (480) 470-3030 or schedule an online consultation to discuss your situation.

 

Sources:
https://www.choosingtherapy.com/divorce-and-children/
https://www.helpguide.org/family/parenting/children-and-divorce

When a marriage ends, the impact extends beyond the former spouses. Children are often at the center of some of the most important decisions, including where they will live and how parenting time will be shared.

As parents navigate these changes, it is not uncommon for a child to feel a stronger connection with one parent or express a preference about their living situation. These emotions can carry significant emotional weight for families, especially when they are more comfortable, secure, or understood in one household.

However, determining where a child resides is not simply based on which parent the child prefers. In Arizona, courts carefully evaluate each case and consider the child’s wishes alongside other factors when deciding what arrangement is in their best interests.

How Arizona Courts Consider a Child’s Preference in Parenting Decisions

If a child’s wishes are relevant to a parenting dispute, Arizona courts may assess their perspective in several ways. Below are some of the methods they may use:

• Considering the Child’s Age and Maturity: There is no specific age at which a child gains the legal right to choose which parent they want to live with. However, as children grow older and demonstrate greater maturity, their preferences may be given greater consideration if the judge believes they can express thoughtful, independent opinions.
• Reasoning: The court may evaluate whether a child’s view is grounded in meaningful concerns, such as emotional well-being, stability, or school-related needs, rather than personal desires, such as fewer household rules or greater freedom.
• Outside Influence: Judges may examine whether a child’s perspective reflects their own genuine opinion or whether a parent, family member, or another outside source has influenced them.
• Conducting a Private Interview: In some cases, a judge may speak privately with the child to better understand their viewpoint, without placing the child in the middle of the dispute.
• Appointing a Court-Appointed Advisor (CAA) or Best Interests Attorney (BIA): A professional may be appointed to gather information, speak with those involved, and provide insight to help the court make a ruling.
• Input From Other Professionals: Counselors, therapists, teachers, and custody evaluators may be asked to offer valuable observations regarding the child’s experiences, emotional needs, and overall well-being.

Helping Families Navigate Child Custody Disputes in Arizona

In Arizona, as in many other states, a minor cannot legally choose which parent they want to live with until they turn 18. However, this does not mean their voice is ignored. If the court determines that a child is capable of expressing an independent opinion, their expressed wishes may be considered as one factor among many in resolving parenting time and legal decision-making.

To learn more about how Arizona courts evaluate custody matters, read our blog on How Child Custody Is Determined in Arizona.

At Shaffer Family Law, we understand that custody disputes can be emotionally challenging and deeply personal. When your child’s future and your parental rights are at stake, having knowledgeable legal guidance can help you navigate the process with confidence. Our attorneys are here to advocate for your goals, protect your interests, and help you pursue arrangements that support your child’s best interests.

Call Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 or request your consultation online today to discuss your options.

 

Parents naturally want what they believe is best for their child, but they do not always agree on what that looks like. In some families, differences in values, parenting styles, and decision-making approaches can create ongoing marital strain and carry over into the divorce process.

When combined with unresolved resentment, poor communication and a lack of trust, even routine disagreements can quickly escalate into a high-conflict custody dispute. Over time, these issues become more persistent and emotionally charged, making it difficult for parents to cooperate and reach agreements that serve their child’s best interests.

If you are involved in a high-conflict custody case in Arizona, understanding your rights, responsibilities, and available legal options can help you navigate the process more effectively. At Shaffer Family Law, we help parents protect their relationships with their children while pursuing arrangements that support their child’s well-being and stability.

High-Conflict Custody Cases in Arizona: Common Challenges Parents Face

Arizona courts no longer use the term “custody.” Instead, legal matters involving child custody are addressed through legal decision-making and parenting time. Legal decision-making involves the authority to make important decisions about a child’s upbringing. Parenting time refers to the schedule that determines how much time each parent spends with the child. Together, these two concepts form the basis of most parenting disputes in Arizona family law cases.

• Communication Breakdowns: At this stage, parents typically have limited or highly strained communication, making it challenging to express concerns clearly or feel heard. This can lead to non-responsiveness, a refusal to engage, delays and misunderstandings.
• Major Parenting Decisions: Important matters such as education, healthcare, extracurricular activities, and religious upbringing can become areas of disagreement when both parties have differing perspectives on what is best for their child and how those decisions should be made.
• Parenting Time Conflicts: Holidays, summers, and birthdays become points of contention, as parents must coordinate and agree on schedules. These situations can be especially difficult when one parent believes the parenting plan is unfair or does not align with their availability.
• Allegations and Distrust: Unfortunately, some high-conflict custody cases involve exaggerated or unfounded allegations intended to gain leverage during proceedings. Claims such as parental alienation or inappropriate behavior may arise, further escalating tension and complicating negotiations.
• Emotional Strain on Children: Children are often caught in the middle of ongoing conflict, impacting their emotional well-being, academic performance, and relationships.
• Court Intervention: When couples are unable to resolve contested issues on their own, court involvement is required, which can lead to longer legal proceedings and increased financial stress.

Navigating a High-Conflict Child Custody Case in Arizona with Shaffer Family Law

High-conflict child custody cases are typically more complex than standard custody matters for various reasons. They often involve heightened emotions, ongoing disagreements, inconsistent communication, allegations of parental alienation, and, in some instances, false or exaggerated accusations, all while children are caught in the middle of the conflict. Together, these factors can significantly complicate negotiations and court proceedings, making timely, workable outcomes more difficult to achieve.

You don’t have to navigate this alone, and you shouldn’t. There is too much at stake to go through this process without support. At Shaffer Family Law, we have extensive experience handling a wide range of cases, including high-conflict custody matters. Our attorneys work to provide stability for your children, reduce the emotional toll these disputes can have on your family, and pursue a resolution that protects your rights and serves your family’s best interests.

Contact Shaffer Family Law today at (480) 470-3030 or request your appointment online to discuss your situation with our team.

 

Arizona law encourages parents going through a divorce to develop a parenting plan that includes a parenting time schedule, allowing both parents to remain actively involved in their child’s life. These schedules typically establish regular weekday and weekend routines while also addressing holidays, school breaks, vacations, birthdays, and other special occasions.

Arizona law encourages parents going through a divorce to develop a parenting plan that includes a parenting time schedule, allowing both parents to remain actively involved in their child’s life.

While creating a parenting schedule may seem simple on the surface, it is often one of the more challenging aspects of a child custody case. Each parent must balance their own needs, work responsibilities, and daily routines, which can become especially challenging when emotions are running high. At the same time, the focus must remain on what is best for the child.

At Shaffer Family Law, our attorneys guide clients through these important decisions, helping craft custody arrangements that support a child’s stability and well-being while reflecting each family’s unique circumstances. Continue reading to learn more about some of the most commonly used parenting time schedules.

Common Parenting Time Schedules in Arizona: Which Is Right for Your Family?

Every family is unique, which means there is no one-size-fits-all solution. What fits one household may not be practical or effective for another.

• Equal Parenting Time (50/50)
  • Alternating Weeks: Each parent has the child for a full week before switching. Simple and easy to follow, it provides longer, uninterrupted time with each parent, helping promote stability and consistency.
  • 2-2-3 Schedule: The child spends 2 days with one parent, 2 days with the other, and then 3 days with the first parent, rotating weekly. This promotes frequent, consistent contact with both parents and is often well-suited for younger children who benefit from regular interaction.
  • 2-2-5-5 Schedule: The child spends 2 days with one parent, 2 days with the other, then 5 days with each parent on a repeating cycle. This works well for school-aged children because it reduces transitions and supports a more predictable routine.
• Primary Residential Parent Schedule
  • Alternating Weekends with a Midweek Visit: The child primarily lives with one parent and spends every other weekend plus one midweek visit or overnight with the other parent. These schedules are often used when parents live farther apart or have demanding jobs.
  • 60/40 Schedule: One parent has the child approximately 60% of the time, while the other has about 40%. In most cases, this means the child spends four days per week with one parent and three days with the other.
  • 70/30 Schedule: One parent has the child approximately 70% of the time, while the other has about 30%. This option can be structured in different ways, including weekday/weekend splits or longer block arrangements, such as two weeks with one parent followed by one week with the other.

Arizona Child Custody Lawyer for Parenting Time and Custody Disputes

As you can see, there are a variety of options available, and these are just some of the most commonly used. Families can also create customized arrangements based on their unique commitments and circumstances.

However, both parties must first agree on a parenting plan. If they are unable to reach an agreement, the matter may be submitted to the court, which will determine a plan based on what is in the child’s best interests. Read our blog, How Parenting Time Works in Arizona Child Custody Cases, to learn more.

Finding the right parenting time schedule can feel overwhelming, but it is one of the most important steps in building a stable future for your child. Reaching that outcome requires careful planning, thoughtful consideration and a willingness to cooperate.

At Shaffer Family Law, we are committed to helping parents move forward with practical solutions that protect their rights and support their child’s well-being. Whenever possible, we work to resolve matters amicably, but we are fully prepared to advocate for you in court when litigation becomes necessary. If you already have a parenting plan that needs modification, we can assist you in pursuing those changes.

Call us at (480) 470-3030 or request an appointment online to schedule your consultation.

 

Sources:
https://www.ourfamilywizard.com/blog/parenting-schedules-how-build-plan-works-your-family

 

Many changes come with divorce, and one of the hardest can be adjusting to spending less time with your children than you were used to. What some states still refer to as “visitation” is called parenting time under Arizona law, a more neutral term that refers to the schedule outlining when your children are in each parent’s care.

Arizona courts prioritize the child’s best interests and generally encourage arrangements that allow the child to maintain a strong, meaningful bond with both parents when it is safe and appropriate. In some situations, this may result in schedules that are equal or nearly equal, but that outcome is not guaranteed. That’s why having the right legal guidance matters. Custody disputes can quickly become emotional and legally complex, and even small mistakes can have a lasting impact on your child’s life and on your relationship with them for years to come.

At Shaffer Family Law, we bring clarity to a confusing process by helping parents better understand how parenting time works in Arizona custody cases, so they feel more prepared for the legal process and better equipped to make decisions that support both their child’s future and their own.

How Arizona Courts Determine Parenting Time

First, parents are generally required to submit a parenting plan in Arizona custody cases that outlines legal decision-making, parenting time schedules, communication guidelines, and any special circumstances. If both parties agree to the terms, the judge will review the agreement before entering it as a court order. However, if they can’t, the court will make a final determination based on the child’s best interests.

Some factors they may consider include:

• The child’s age and health
• The child’s relationship with each parent
• Each parent’s work schedule and availability
• The distance between the parents’ homes
• The child’s school schedule and routine
• The suitability of each parent’s home environment
• The child’s adjustment to home, school, and community
• Each parent’s ability to provide a stable and consistent environment
• The mental and physical health of all parties involved
• Each parent’s willingness to support a positive relationship with the other parent
• Any history of domestic violence, substance abuse, or neglect
• The child’s wishes, depending on age and maturity

The court’s primary objective is to create a parenting arrangement that promotes the child’s emotional, physical, and developmental well-being.

Protect Your Parental Rights in Arizona with Shaffer Family Law

For years, Shaffer Family Law has proudly served Maricopa County, guiding families and individuals to navigate all aspects of family law and providing strong advocacy during some of their most difficult times. Whether you need assistance crafting a parenting plan, modifying an existing agreement, or representation in court when necessary, we are here to stand by your side. And when a co-parent fails to follow a court-ordered parenting schedule, we help you pursue enforcement through the Arizona family court system, including documenting missed visits and communication issues to support and strengthen your case.

If you’re facing a divorce or believe a custody dispute may be on the horizon, it’s important to understand what to expect and how to prepare. Call us today at (480) 470-3030 or request your appointment online to get started and discuss your legal matter.

 

Sources:
https://www.azleg.gov/ars/25/00403.htm
https://azcourthelp.org/faq/legal-decision-making-and-parenting-time/396-custody-considerations

 

Preparing for your initial divorce consultation can be the moment it truly sinks in that this is real. Whether you have been planning for a while or have recently been served divorce papers, this appointment is an important first step in unraveling the years, often decades, of life you built with your spouse.

To better prepare you, the team at Shaffer Family Law has put together a general guide outlining what is typically helpful to have on hand before your consultation. While these items are commonly recommended, it is always best to confirm with your attorney which specific documents or information they would like you to bring based on your individual circumstances.

Key Steps to Prepare for Your First Divorce Consultation

• Your Goals and Needs: Before meeting with a divorce attorney, take time to reflect on your priorities and what you hope to achieve. While emotions can run high, having a clear understanding of your goals guides the conversation and ensures your attorney can focus on what matters most to you.
• Personal Information: A valid photo ID or driver’s license is required for identification purposes. It is also important to have your marriage certificate available, as it serves as official proof of your marriage and establishes the legal basis of your case.
• Child-Related Documents: If you and your spouse have children, bring any relevant records such as birth certificates, any existing parenting arrangements (formal or informal), and schedules related to their care. You should also be prepared to discuss details about their current living situation, daily care, healthcare, schooling, and any other information relevant to their well-being.
• Financial Documents: Gather and organize documents that give your legal team a clear understanding of your financial situation, including recent pay stubs, tax returns, bank statements, and retirement or investment account records.
• List of Assets and Debts: Property division is a key part of the divorce process, so it is important to outline both the assets you own and what you believe is fair to seek. In addition, debts are also considered, so you should list any outstanding financial obligations.
• Legal Documents and Court Orders: Have copies of any prenuptial or postnuptial agreements, along with relevant court documents such as protective orders, filed divorce petitions, or responses, if applicable.
• Prepare a List of Questions: For many people, the consultation is the first time they gain a clear understanding of how the divorce process works and what it may look like in their specific situation. Because of that, it is helpful to compile a list of any questions or concerns that come to mind so you can make the most of your time and get the clarity you need.

Schedule a Consultation with an Arizona Divorce Attorney at Shaffer Family Law

At Shaffer Family Law, our goal is to ensure you get real value from your initial consultation. While beginning the divorce process can feel overwhelming, coming prepared can make a significant difference in both your experience and the outcome of that first meeting. It helps you feel more confident and in control, while also giving you peace of mind knowing you have a knowledgeable team guiding you from start to finish.

Just as importantly, it allows our attorneys to quickly understand the key facts of your case, accurately assess your situation, and clearly outline the options and strategies that best align with your goals. If you’re ready to take the next step, contact Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 or request your appointment online.

 

 

Divorce is never just between two people; it affects the entire family. While it is a decision made by a couple and, in many cases, unavoidable, it can still be an emotionally challenging and confusing time for everyone involved. And if you share children, one of the first and most important questions that arises is: how do you tell them about this?

This is often one of the most difficult and emotionally painful conversations you will ever have. For kids, the separation of their parents and the breakdown of the family unit can be deeply unsettling and, at times, even traumatic. They may experience shock, uncertainty, anger, sadness, or guilt, and in some cases may even blame themselves for what is happening.

That is why the way you communicate with your children about your divorce is just as essential as the decisions you make throughout the process. While there is no single “perfect” way to explain it, there are thoughtful and effective ways parents can help their children feel supported, secure, and understood. Keep reading to learn how.

Tips for Parents on Talking to Kids About Divorce

• Tell Them Together: If possible, both parents should be present for the conversation. Presenting a united, calm message can help reassure your little ones that, although your relationship is changing, you remain committed to working together as their parents.
• Choose the Right Time and Setting: Pick a quiet, comfortable space where your children are at ease. Avoid bringing it up on holidays or other special occasions, or right before school or bedtime.
• Plan Ahead: Take time in advance to thoughtfully plan what you will say. This is not the moment to fully explain the “why,” but to focus on helping your kids feel safe and reassured that both parents love them and will continue to care for them.
• Keep It Age-Appropriate: What you say should depend on your child’s age and level of maturity. Keep the explanation simple, clear, and consistent, using language they can easily understand. Avoid overwhelming them with too many details; instead, let their questions guide the depth of the conversation.
• Emphasize It’s Not Their Fault: Make sure they understand that the divorce is not their fault and has nothing to do with anything they did or didn’t do.
• Acknowledge Their Emotions: Every child is different, so their reactions can vary widely. Whether they are sad, confused, angry, or even remain silent, all of these reactions are normal. Give them time to process, and when they’re ready, listen without judgment, validate their experience and let them know their emotions are understood, accepted and safe to express.
• Discuss What Comes Next: Help them understand what they can expect moving forward. Be specific about living arrangements, school routines, and time with each parent. Just as importantly, emphasize what will stay the same, as consistency helps create a sense of stability during this transition.

Protect Your Future with Shaffer Family Law

Talking to your kids about your separation is one of the most difficult conversations you will ever have as a parent. The reality is that this is not a one-time discussion. You will likely need to revisit it several times, offering clarity and reassurance as new questions and emotions arise. Approach it with honesty, compassion and patience. The way you communicate and the consistency of your presence can play a meaningful role in helping them cope, adjust, and move through this transition with emotional security and stability.

Divorce is a life-altering transition, not only for parents but also for children. The decisions made during this period will shape your family’s future. With guidance from Shaffer Family Law, you can make informed decisions, protect your interests, and work toward a fair outcome in important matters such as property division, custody, visitation, and spousal maintenance.

Get the support you need to step into the next chapter with clear direction, confidence and peace of mind. Contact us at (480) 470-3030 or request your appointment online .

 

Sources:
https://www.helpguide.org/family/parenting/children-and-divorce

https://www.ourfamilywizard.com/blog/how-tell-kids-about-divorce

 

A home is more than just a place to live; it represents the beginning of a couple’s shared life and, for many, the foundation of their family. From that very first look to moving in together and eventually raising children, it’s where lasting memories are made, daily routines take shape, and meaningful milestones are celebrated over time.

Because of this deep emotional connection, the property’s fate can also become one of the most contentious issues in divorce. Letting go of a space filled with cherished moments isn’t easy, especially when it holds value that goes beyond finances. In many cases, both spouses feel a strong sense of attachment, making it even more challenging to determine what comes next.

If you’re going through a divorce in Arizona, understanding your rights and options regarding the family home is an important first step. At Shaffer Family Law, we guide families in Maricopa County and surrounding areas through this process with compassion and clear direction, helping you make informed decisions while keeping your best interests at the center of every step.

How Is the Family Home Divided in a Divorce?

If the house was purchased during the marriage, it is generally considered community property and jointly owned regardless of whose name is on the title, and is subject to division. Here are some outcomes to consider:

• Sell the Home and Divide the Proceeds: This is a common option many choose to create a clean financial break and allow both parties to move forward independently. After the mortgage, closing costs, and any liens are paid, the remaining proceeds are split between both spouses.
• One Spouse Keeps the Home: If one spouse wishes to remain in the home, they can buy out the other spouse’s share of the equity.
• Co-Ownership: Some couples choose to keep both names on the property temporarily, often to maintain stability for children or for financial reasons. If you pursue this option, it is important to establish clear agreements outlining mortgage payments, property taxes, insurance, and maintenance responsibilities to avoid future disputes.

Protect Your Home and Assets with Shaffer Family Law

The family home is often one of the largest financial assets in a divorce, so it’s important to approach the process with care. Obtaining an accurate appraisal and valuation of the property is essential to understanding its value and moving forward with confidence.

Whether you’re considering divorce or have already begun, the choices you make now can have a lasting impact on your future. Too often, emotions take over, and one spouse may do whatever it takes to keep the house, only to be left with the burden of maintaining it. Between mortgage payments, property taxes, insurance, and ongoing upkeep, it can be difficult to sustain on a single income, which can affect your long-term financial stability.

Even after a divorce is finalized, both parties may still be responsible for the mortgage if their names remain on the loan. Missed payments can negatively impact both parties’ credit, which is why refinancing is often a critical step when one spouse keeps the home.

The attorneys at Shaffer Family Law have extensive experience in family law, guiding clients through divorce, property division, child custody, and spousal support. We are committed to protecting your rights, helping you avoid costly mistakes, and working toward a fair, practical outcome that supports what matters most to you. Call us at (480) 470-3030 or request your appointment online today.