Tips from Chandler family law attorney Archives - Page 15 of 17

Are There Consequences and Penalties for Hiding Assets in A Divorce? Chandler, Arizona

Divorces can be messy and complicated, but one thing you never want to do is hide assets when you’re going through a divorce. A legal requirement for divorcing couples is disclosing all assets they have, which includes debt, income, and expenses.

When one partner has more than the other, it may be tempting to cheat or lie to keep more of an asset to themselves. Although it’s illegal to hide assets in a divorce, some people still do it, especially if they’re the higher income earner.

People hide assets for a variety of reasons, but the main one usually is not having to share the majority of their money with their divorcing partner. These people often use a variety of “dirty tricks” to lie, including undervaluing, hiding or understating marital property.

They might also overstate debts or report a lower income than they actually have. The person hiding assets in a divorce does so to keep more property or assets for themselves and want to prevent their ex from getting a fair settlement.

According to the National Endowment for Financial Education, about 31% of US adults who have assets with their spouse mention that they’ve lied about money in their marriage. While it can be either party in a marriage, many times it’s more likely for men to lie about their assets than women.

Lying during a divorce proceeding is not only wrong and unfair, but it’s also illegal. The rules of civil procedure indicate that when an individual signs a court document that they are agreeing to the fact that the contents of the document are true and correct.

So, when a couple of signs the Financial Affidavit required in every contested and some uncontested divorce cases, they are swearing that they are telling the truth about all their finances. This includes all debts, income, assets, expenses, liabilities and more.

Because lying about one’s assets in a divorce case is illegal, it’s essential to hire a skilled divorce lawyer to handle the case. Having someone with professional expertise will help a divorcing person stay on the right side of the law and will still have your financial future in their best interests.

A divorce attorney will ensure that you’re not only telling the truth about your assets but that your ex-spouse is doing the same so that the divorce settlement is as fair as possible.

What Happens If You Lie About Assets in A Divorce?

If you lie under oath, you will face some serious consequences. Although penalties for hiding assets in a divorce will vary from state to state (and even case to case), you’ll still be in blatant contempt of the court no matter where your divorce is finalized.

If a judge finds out that someone is knowingly violating asset disclosure laws, then the judge might make them pay for their ex-spouse’s attorney fees and fines. Or the judge will dismiss all of the lying party’s claims. For more serious cases, jail time can be given to the person hiding assets in a divorce case.

The judge might also make you pay additional penalties and provide your ex-spouse with a larger distribution in the divorce settlement (or even the entire amount), instead of splitting it if you were honest from the start.

If you lie about your assets or try to hide them, you’ll also lose all respect and credibility by the judge for the duration of your case. The fact that you lied about assets will make the judge think that you’re lying about other things in the rest of the divorce process.

How to Uncover Hidden Assets?

There are different things a person can do to try and uncover the truth about hidden assets their ex-spouse might be hiding. The first is to hire a private investigator to follow around your ex-spouse to see if they use a bank you didn’t know about if they actually work full time.

You can also employ a forensic accountant, who is a financial expert and will look at all the family’s finances to see if there is money being hidden. They’ll be able to help you figure out if there are secret accounts or if expenses are more than the income your ex-spouse claims to bring home.

During a divorce, the court will allow divorcing spouses to seek out certain information during the discovery phase of the case. This is where you can subpoena various people to come to help you plead your case. You can subpoena your ex-spouse’s employer and get records or even get their bank statements.

In some cases, you might not find out about hidden assets until after the divorce is finalized. You may learn later that your ex-spouse earns more than he claimed during the divorce process, sold a property they had during your marriage or more.

If this happens, you can still get them in trouble and have a fair settlement. You simply have to file a motion in court about the hidden asset in the court your divorce was finalized and ask that your case be reopened.

However, amending a divorce agreement is much easier if you live in a community property state, which means that all assets earned in a marriage are now joint assets. But inequitable distribution states, the court might not change the final divorce settlement.

In these states, you’ll need to do a lot of research during the divorce process and anything found afterward won’t be held up in court. But you could still sue your ex-spouse in civil court, claiming monetary damages.

Looking For An Chandler, Arizona Divorce or Family Law Attorney?

Tips from Chandler family law attorney

The law is tricky and can be very confusing, complex and difficult to comprehend and fully understand. To help, you’ll need to hire the best divorce lawyer in Arizona! While many believe that they might be able to go about divorce, child custody, child support or alimony situation on their own, the truth is that they probably won’t be successful without the help from a qualified Chandler divorce lawyer.

While you can always represent yourself (also classified as “pro se litigants”), it’s always better to simply hire the Arizona divorce lawyer that you meet within the end. Hiring a professional will make the entire process easier for you, especially if you’re already going through a very difficult time in your life. Here are some reasons why you’ll want to bite the bullet and simply hire the Arizona divorce attorney you initially wanted to go with:

Legal Advocacy and Protection: Family law can be very complicated, which is why it’s better to leave it up to a professional who knows what they are doing. There are literally hundreds of different statues to know and stay on top of in the legal world, and you’d have to know all the outcomes of past court cases if you want to be successful.

If one party is not represented and the other party is, you’ll easily get taken advantage of given your lack of knowledge. Hiring the Arizona divorce lawyer you feel the most comfortable with will protect your legal rights and fight for you. They’ll protect your rights throughout the entire process so that you aren’t taken advantage of.

You’ll have a way better outcome if you have a professional Chandler divorce attorney on your side than if you don’t! They’ll know what you’re reasonably entitled to, what issues to properly prepare for and how to handle false allegations and evidence.

Bullying Prevention: Many times, one party will make crazy threats out of frustration or as a way to intimidate or bully. This happens quite often in divorce proceedings and the harassed party will end up in submission because they fear the threats are true. But having the best Arizona divorce lawyer by your side can eliminate this occurrence from happening, keeping the other party in check.

Plus, if you have a Chandler divorce attorney handling the case, you won’t have to worry about getting harassed by the other party’s lawyer. You won’t have to talk directly to them or deal with them since your own attorney will handle communication at all times.

Peace of mind: Going through a divorce or a custody battle can take a lot of out of you. You’ll most likely be stressed, emotional and frustrated by the entire situation. A lot of this stress might come from feeling as if you’re not in control of everything or fear of what’s going to happen next. Hiring a Chandler divorce attorney can help ease all that stress. They’ll be able to help you comprehend what’s happening every step of the way so that you don’t feel overwhelmed by it all.

They’ll also keep you in the loop of everything and will provide you with the best legal options to help increase your chances of winning the case. You’ll be able to fully understand everything so that you don’t sign or agree to something that you’ll regret later on.

Proper Fillings and Procedures: The amount of paperwork involved with a divorce or custody battle can be intimidating. However, a Chandler divorce lawyer will help you fill out everything correctly, keep a calendar of important dates for you and file it all within the necessary time frame. In court, there are specific formats and ways to fill out documents, present evidence and speak to the judge. If the information is not presented correctly, your case can be thrown out, so it’s better if you have someone that knows what they’re doing to help you along the way.
An Objective Sounding Board: When it comes to a divorce, you might want to go to friends and family to be your sounding board, but it’s best if you hire a Chandler divorce attorney. They’ll be able to give you sound advice when it comes to your case. You’ll need a lot of support at this difficult time in your life and a lawyer will be an objective party who will give you the facts needed to be successful.

Although you might get a lot of advice elsewhere, the best advice as it relates to your case will always come from your lawyer.

Better Efficiency: If you were to represent yourself in a divorce or custody hearing, you’d spend a lot of time researching what needs to be done. But by hiring a Chandler divorce attorney, you’d be saving yourself a lot of time given their expertise on the subject. So they’ll spend less time doing what will take you days to do.

On top of researching family law and court proceedings, you’d have to stay on top of important dates, deadlines, paperwork and the like, which will only add to your already full plate. You might not have the energy or time to really devote to your case, but your family lawyer in Chandler, AZ, will!

Complete Closure: Hiring a Chandler Family law attorney will give you the closure needed to move past this difficult time. They’ll make sure that all the issues are addressed properly so that you don’t have any problems in the future (which might end up in more litigation). Thanks to a quailed Chandler family law attorney on your case, you won’t have to worry about any loose ends at the end of your case. Plus, they can also bring up possible future scenarios now and discuss how to resolve them now so that they aren’t even an issue later.

You’ll need to ultimately do what’s best for your case and interests in the end. But many times, that means hiring a Chandler family law attorney so that you feel confident throughout the divorce or custody process.

If you’re considering filing divorce, Shaffer Family Law in Chandler can help you file and give you the support you will need throughout the process. Give us a call at (480) 470-3030 today!

Little-Known Benefits of Divorce Chandler, Arizona

Tips from Chandler family law attorney

Our Chandler Divorce Lawyers are here to give you the advice you need to get the results you desire. Ultimately, divorce is terrible. From the of hiring a lawyer to losing an additional income, divorce can come at a high price. In addition, it is common for people to walk away from the proceedings with a lot fewer assets and savings for retirement. And on top of everything else, it also takes an emotional toll on a person. However, divorce doesn’t isn’t all bad, especially when it comes to financial benefits it can come with. While not a reason to run out and get a divorce, here’s a few financial benefits that could make a sad situation seem a little better.

Easier and more control over budgeting: The end of a marriage often means the end of fights over finances. No more trying to figure out the priorities in the budget, especially if you’ve spent the past few years persuading or pleading your now ex-spouse to cut back on spending.
Early access to your retirement fund: A little known fact is that divorce is one of the few times you would be able to access your retirement account early and not be penalized for early withdrawal. Though, it’s important to be careful when taking money out of your retirement account. It can be a risky move, but it is a nice option for the newly divorced when they may not otherwise have one.
Better returns on investments: Divorce could mean better investment returns, especially for women. Men tend to be more aggressive when it comes to investments and take more risks. Divorce is a good time for women to take charge of their own retirement planning, which could be positive financially in the long run.
Financial aid for the kids: Divorce has been known to be difficult for children. One good thing for them involves college financial aid. When it comes to signing up with the Free Application for Federal Student Aid, or FAFSA, you are only required to submit financial information from the parent that has full custody, instead of financial information both parents. Of course, child support and alimony received from the non-custodial parent will need to be included for FAFSA, though any additional financial assistance is helpful.
Older divorcees have Social Security perks: Divorced spouses may be able to file for Social Security spousal benefits when they reach retirement age. You’re eligible for these benefits if you and your ex were married for at least 10 years. The best thing about this is your ex-spouse doesn’t even know you’re doing it and it won’t impact their benefits.
Reevaluate financial priorities. While people are sometimes angered by the lifestyle changes caused by divorce, there is actually a lot of opportunities for them to rethink priorities and start fresh. Even major adjustments, such as giving up property, can be beneficial in the long run. It could be better financially a smaller house or even an apartment.

Divorce doesn’t have to mean a dwindled down bank account. Even with less income, divorced people can build wealth if they use their resources wisely. Of course, not everyone’s financial situation will improve with divorce, but it’s surprising how it can improve. It’s important to remember that getting a divorce isn’t something you should rush into, but if you find yourself in a marriage that isn’t working, don’t give up hope. You may still come out ahead when it comes to the financial benefits of divorce.

At Shaffer Family Law, we understand the fine details of the legal system and will give you the guidance you need to get through the divorce process, answer your questions, and be an advocate for you. If you are ready to move forward, we invite you to give us a call at (480) 470-3030 today.

Annulment vs. Divorce Chandler, Arizona

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The two ways to legally end a marriage are through annulment and divorce. An annulment is a legal process that cancels a marriage between a man and a woman. When a marriage is annulled, it’s basically completely erased and when it comes to legality, it essentially declares that the marriage never officially existed and was at no time valid.

A divorce, or legal termination of a marriage, is the ending of a marriage between two people is considered valid or legal. A divorce ends with both parties returning to a single status with the ability to get married again. Each individual state has its own laws when it comes to the grounds for marriage annulment or divorce, but there are many things that are universally agreed upon.

An annulment case can be started by either person in the marriage and the person initiating the annulment has to provide proof that they have grounds to do so and they can prove it, the marriage will be considered invalid by the court. Here are a few common grounds for annulment:

Bigamy (Adultery): someone was already married to another person
Forced Consent: someone was forced or threatened into marriage and only entered into it under coercion
Deception: one of the spouses got into the marriage based on falsehoods or misrepresentation
Marriage Forbidden by Law: Usually in the case that the marriage was between people that have a familial relationship (incest)
Mental Illness: One of the spouses was mentally ill or emotionally troubled during the marriage
Under the Influence: Someone was drunk or on drugs at the time of the marriage, essentially making them unable to make informed consent
Inability to Satisfy Needs: One of the spouses was physically unable to have sexual relations or was impotent during the marriage
Underage: Someone was too young to get married without parental consent or approval from the court

Depending on where you live, divorces can be a lot more complicated in comparison to an annulment. Like annulment cases, each state has its own laws when it comes to divorce. Generally, divorce cases involve marital assets being divided, and debts being settled. If there are children involved, a divorce proceeding decides on custody, visitation rights, and spousal and child support.

It’s important to familiarize yourself with the laws. It can be the best way to learn what your rights are when it comes to marital dissolution and can also help you decide whether an annulment or divorce is right for you. If you’re considering filing divorce, Shaffer Family Law in Chandler can help you file and give you the support you will need throughout the process. Give us a call at (480) 470-3030 today!

Here’s What Divorce Can Cost You, Chandler, Arizona

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Everything comes at a – especially when you mess with someone’s heart. Sometimes the is in literal dollars and sometimes you pay an emotional uproar. When it comes to divorce, you generally pay in both. For marriage, financial support, betrayal, and divorce are regularly, and hopelessly, intertwined. And when you’re at risk of having them control your life; it makes you wonder what the real of adultery is.

An Emotional Cost

It goes without saying that when you have an affair, you are risking destroying your marriage. While plenty of couples are able to get through infidelity and work it out, but the reality is there are many more that don’t. A spouse’s affair is often the death of a marriage. Even those marriages that make it through an affair, a spouse’s cheating makes it hard for trust to truly be felt in a relationship again.

While that trust can be rebuilt, most couples end up not trying to at all. It’s especially if the marriage was failing long before the affair even happened. But adultery affects more than just your marriage, and your heart, it leads to divorce, which can wreak havoc on your finances too. Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately, marital infidelity doesn’t have to have as big of an impact on the financial side of divorce as it can be.

Adultery and Divorce

Adultery is one of the oldest grounds for divorce and one of the most popular storylines when it comes to movies and TV shows. In fact, historically, in many cultures, adultery was punishable by death. It is still a crime in many states in the United States, though it is an offender is rarely ever prosecuted nowadays.

While scorned spouses still may get emotional satisfaction from filing divorce papers that publicly proclaim that their spouse cheated on them, there is little legal reason to pursue that kind of claim. Infidelity generally does not have a big impact on custody, child support, or parenting time at all. The only time a spouse’s affair will affect the outcome of a divorce is when the affair itself had a direct effect on your children, which of course, rarely happens.

So, unless your spouse dragged your teenager to a strip club or something, your spouse’s infidelity hasn’t directly harmed your kids. Adultery also has no effect on the division of property in the divorce. For example, just because one spouse cheated, it doesn’t mean that the other spouse gets more than them soon to be ex-spouse. However, the only exception to this rule would be dissipation.

Dissipation

Simply put, dissipation is when one person recklessly spends marital funds, or uses a marital asset, for a purpose that does not directly benefit the marriage. Dissipation is funds that have left the marital estate, thus reducing what could possibly be divided in the divorce settlement. Examples include gambling, excessive alcohol use, purchasing illegal drugs, expenses on any activity related to an affair, and unusual or excessive purchases that were not agreed upon by both of those in the marriage. When it comes to adultery, this basically means that one spouse spent money on their affair partner.

You can usually find a few scattered restaurant bills or maybe even a receipt for some flowers or jewelry. And when that’s all you’ve got, the price of paying for an attorney and accountant might not seem worth the dissipation you found. Dissipation is one of those things that the offended spouse knows is happening but is having trouble providing evidence.

An extensive legal analysis of household finances is generally required to identify specific examples of dissipated funds by dates, use, and dollar amounts of the spending. The more efforts that have been made by the disloyal spouse to hide the dissipation; the more analysis will be required.

Few things in life hurt more than discovering that your spouse has been cheating on you. When infidelity destroys your marriage, it’s only natural that you want to use your spouse’s bad acts to punish your spouse. Proving and establishing dissipation might be a bit difficult but understanding the potential impact it can make on the overall division of the remaining martial estate, it might be well worth the effort.

For better or for worse, your spouse’s unfaithfulness may have ruined your marriage, but it’s more than likely to make a huge difference in your divorce. If you are interested in learning more about how Shaffer Family Law can help you through the divorce process, give us a call at (480) 470-3030. You don’t have to go through things alone.

Things to Know About Prenuptial Agreements Chandler, Arizona

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Deciding whether to sign a prenuptial agreement can be one of the most difficult decisions engaged people face. Prenuptial agreements aren’t useful for every couple. While wealthy individuals do often use prenups, prenuptial agreements have far more uses than simply protecting the assets of a wealthy individual. Prenups can be used to:

Protects assets
Protect one person from assuming the debts of the other
Determine how property will be passed after a death
Clarify financial responsibilities during a marriage
Avoid long, often ly disputes if a divorce happens
Put a limit on alimony, if the marriage fails

A premarital agreement tends to take a divorce in two directions: it can make it easier or make it more complicated. A prenup can be used to help resolve some of the issues that are typically discussed during a divorce and there are some obvious benefits. It could help to reduce tension, as well as decrease the need for court intervention in handling problems throughout the divorce process.

As a result, there isn’t much that the attorneys and the court have to do to resolve the case. This is clearly a good thing, especially since it should cut down on legal fees and allow the process to move along much faster. Hiring a Arizona attorney can help if you aren’t familiar with the laws, or if you’re having trouble interpreting the rules. It is common for each person to have their own attorneys review the prenup. Before you file for divorce, you need to get a copy of your prenuptial or postnuptial agreement to use as evidence.

Your attorney will help you review the agreement and make sure that it is valid. If the prenup appears invalid, an attorney will help you get it fully or partially set aside. If it is valid, however, the items must be followed by the court.

If you have questions about drafting a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement, or about how an existing nuptial agreement will affect your divorce case, the attorneys at Shaffer Family Law are here to help. We can answer any questions you may have and help you find affordable, efficient legal solutions that meet your needs.

We are here to help handle any divorce issues as peacefully as possible and with as much compassion as possible. Though, we won’t hesitate to fight aggressively if needed to protect your rights. To schedule an initial consultation, give our Arizona office a call at (480) 470-3030.

So, Who Gets the Furbaby in a Divorce? Chandler, Arizona

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According to the American Veterinary Medical Association, 36.5% of Americans own dogs and 30.4% of Americans own cats. So, it is not uncommon when a married couple divorces for the question of who gets to keep the pets to arise. Most of the laws are designed to protect the best interests of human children in divorces, like shared custody, visitation rights, and alimony. The laws for pets are intended to focus on the best interest of the owner instead.

Under the law, pets are considered personal property, which means that they are capable of human ownership and control. The law sees granting shared custody or visitation of the pets would be exactly the same as them trading their television or video game system back and forth from one week to the next.

Before a court decides who gets what property in a divorce, it should usually be decided whether it’s in the territory of being a “community property” which will be split 50/50 or a reasonable distribution, aka split fairly. It must then be decided which property actually belongs to the couple (rather each individual) and how much the property is worth. Any agreements that the couple already decided on will also be considered, especially in the case where there is a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement. Even in deciding who gets the pets, the court will go through the same steps as if it’s any other piece of property.

Pets are becoming such a big part of our regular lives; some courts are beginning to change this analysis and are even agreeing to treat pets more like children. This has largely occurred with dogs. Courts can help consider what is best for the interest of the pets and help determine who gets custody of them. Courts have also granted shared custody, visitation, and alimony payments for the owners. The majority of the time, owners will have to work out a contract between themselves instead.

It seems trivial; figuring out who gets custody of a 3-year-old poodle or a 10-year-old calico cat. But pets are a part of the family and a part of the equation when it comes to a lot of divorces. Though many people might think it’s ridiculous, divorce does take a toll on pets.

A dog that was once energetic and full of life may become depressed. They may eat less, sleep more, and even lose interest in activities, like walking or playing with their neighborhood friends. These are typically signs that your pet is stressed out. Here are some things you should consider if you do have a pet involved in your divorce:

Put aside your own feelings to the right decision and think about what is best for your furbaby. The both of you should consider such aspects as who fed and cared for them the most before the divorce, who has the funds to be able to pay for their veterinary care, food, and other expenses, and when it comes down to it, who the pet is closest to. Trust me, you know.
You should consider letting the pet go where the children go. This allows them to say in the family where and be surrounded by familiar things and their routine is not changed so drastically.
So, you have two pets and each of you should get one, right? More than likely, these pets are bonded to each other and you should try to keep them together. Separating them would probably not be in their best interest and you’d more than likely have a very sad dog on your hands.
Once you do decide on who gets custody or how you’ll be sharing custody of the pet or pets, make sure to spend time with them. Play with them and take them to the veterinarian to make sure they are doing well physically.

If keeping your pets is important to you, discuss it with a Arizona family law attorney at Shaffer Family Law, sooner rather than later. Ultimately, even deciding who gets the pets after divorce is something that should be well-thought-out. While having pets can significant benefits for health, it is important to decide whether keeping your pets is truly in your children’s and your best interests for the moment. Give Shaffer Family Law a call at (480) 470-3030 today!

5 Reasons to Call Our Chandler, Arizona Family Law Attorneys

Tips from Chandler family law attorney

Divorce is a process that, at the end of the day, dissolves a legal partnership between two people. The kind of legal representation you need when faced with a divorce depends on the complexity of that partnership. The more complex your divorce, the greater your need will be for legal representation to protect your rights and interests. In Arizona, there a good handful of lawyers you can choose from but choosing Shaffer Family Law could be the best choice you make. Considerations when evaluating how complex your divorce case will be:

Our family law attorneys are experienced in working in family law courts in your area. Local experience and knowledge of local legal strategies are best when it comes to presenting a case and we are defending cases in your area every day.
Our attorneys work hard to resolve your situation efficiently, which will save you more money in the long run.
Our family attorneys tailor our representation to seek great results that make sense for our clients under their particular circumstances.
All of our attorneys are deeply patient about family law and care about their clients. When you have an attorney, one who cares and works hard to fight for you, it makes all the difference.
A lawyer can make sure that every issue pertinent to your situation gets addressed, whether it is big or small. It is common for people to overlook areas like taxes, division of retirement assets, parenting plans, allocation of debts, and many other concerns when they go through the divorce paperwork alone.

A divorce lawyer at Shaffer Family Law in Arizona will be able to identify and ensure that your divorce settlement addresses every issue. Family law cases can be very complex and very different for everyone and the best way to obtain the information you need is to seek legal advice for your case.

At Shaffer Family Law, we pride ourselves on helping our clients navigate through the maze of divorce in ways that will ultimately save them time, stress, and money. Give us a call at (480) 470-3030 today to set up your initial consultation.

Selling Your Home in a Divorce in Chandler, Arizona

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As a couple goes through the process of a divorce, deciding what to do with the home they brought together can be complicated. Oftentimes, one person wants to keep the house so they end up buying the other spouse out, or they may choose to keep the home and sell it after the divorce is settled. Others may choose to sell their home during the divorce, which may be beneficial during the divorce process, both financially and personally.

Any profit from the sale is a good way to provide each person with enough money for a fresh start. Selling the marital home and removing the shared investment can provide closure legally and emotionally. Choosing to sell before the divorce is finalized can also help provide each party with the means to deal with other financial responsibilities and debts. Many people decide to sell their home because neither one of them will be able to afford to keep it after the separation.

Before you sell your home, there are a lot of responsibilities because some homes may need maintenance or renovating before they are ready to sell. This takes money, time, and requires some decision-making from both of you. So, prepare yourself and discuss any of your priorities with your divorce attorney. Your attorney is there for you to be able to check in and discuss any final decisions that are made.

If you choose to work with a real estate agent, you and your ex can use the same agent since you are both have the same goal and having someone to help sell the house can help make the process easier. Go over any important factors with your ex-spouse to help avoid any future arguments, which will help take stress off yourself. The best thing to do is to sit with your ex-spouse and talk about any relevant issues connected with the sale of your home.

It’s important to remember when you are going through any sort of family-related lawsuit, the best thing you can do is consult with a qualified divorce lawyer before you take any other steps forward. Divorce cases require a detailed understanding of the facts, the processes, and the law.

If you are filing for divorce or have been served divorce papers, you should consult with an attorney, who can help you with the divorce process and give you advice when it comes to specific processes, like selling your home. At Shaffer Family Law in Chandler, you can have one of our attorneys do a free evaluation of your case! Give us a call at (480) 470-3030.

How Grandparents Can Help During a Divorce in Chandler, Arizona

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Divorce is a tough process for everyone in the family, though grandparents are often overlooked during the process. A divorce can negatively affect their lives as well, especially if the divorce restricts access to your son or daughter’s children. Grandparents are generally seen as a source of comfort, fun, and plenty of love for many kids and the stress of a divorce in the family can leave grandparents feeling confused about what their role and relationship in the family is now that things are different. A grandparent will of course want to support their adult child, while also offering support to the grandkids. It is important, though, that caring and supportive role be navigated with care during this difficult time.

Here are a few tips for grandparents on how they can handle their children getting a divorce:

Maintain Relationships: When around your grandkids, it’s important that you keep things normal. If you regularly visit them, stick to this schedule as best as you can. This is especially important for those who have a close relationship with their grandparents. They will appreciate you and the support you’re giving them. It’s important to remember that if you didn’t have a very close relationship with them before the divorce, it may be because it’s hard to make that connection at this moment. Still be there for them, but don’t try to pressure them into doing something they’re not comfortable with doing right now.
Try not to choose sides: As a parent, you’re probably feeling a sense of strong alliance to your adult. Even if you don’t particularly like their ex-spouse, it is not an excuse to say mean things about this person – especially in front of your grandkids. It’s best to not interfere with the way your grandkids’ feel about their parents. Keep talk surrounding their parents positive, at the very least, neutral. Instead of trying to pry information out of them about the divorce, keep an eye on them to make sure that they are doing well, both emotionally and physically.
Communicate with your ex Son/Daughter-In-Law: Unfortunately, even after a divorce, your ex-son or daughter-in-law will be a part of your life on some level, especially because they will either be sharing custody or be the sole caretakers of your grandchildren. So, it is better to find a way to continue a relationship with them sooner than later. When you maintain this relationship, it will make it easier to be around the other parent for moments like school graduations or your grandchild’s future wedding. Of course, if you are close to the other parent, you should take a few steps back for the sake of your adult child and their feelings. Tread lightly, with caution, and with respect.
Make Holidays Stress-free: After divorce, you’ll realize that traditions with your grandkids, like birthdays and holidays, won’t be the same. The most important thing you can do is give your grandkids the best birthday or holiday you can give them. Accept the fact that they’ll likely spend time with their other family for certain events, maybe more often than with you, but your time with them will come. Try to focus on building new traditions with them, some that you can carry on as you all move forward.
Keep calm, carry on: Remember, the important thing to do is to keep the time you spend with your grandchildren fun and positive. Positive attitudes keep things positive for them, especially since they are probably being impacted the most by the divorce. Plan fun activities that you know they will enjoy, which will not only make their time with you enjoyable but will take their mind off any stress they might be going through. Demonstrating how to stay peaceful and calm, even in the face of challenges, will give your grandkids a positive example on how to handle the stresses life will throw at them.

Tips from Chandler family law attorney

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