No matter how old your children are, your divorce is going to be hard for them. Younger kids often struggle to understand and accept changes, while older kids and teens may understand but still end up resentful. Unless things are different, you and your ex may find yourselves sharing custody in the future. Here some tips to help bring stability to you and your children’s lives. Here are some things to keep in mind for your children:
Do not Put Your Kids in the Middle
One important thing to do is to not complain about each other or get into fights in front of the children. Instead of showing them you are divided, focus on staying positive and encourage them to want to spend time with their other parent. Please do not make them feel like they must choose between you.
Make Communication a Priority
You and your ex need to keep one another fully informed about what you do while you have the children and share any critical information involving the children, like school conflicts. You can share most of this written form, either email or text message. If you cannot keep cordial, you may consider using a facilitated custody communication program.
Make Consistent Rules for Both Households
Consistency and structure are vital to the success and development of children. While a routine at one home may be stable, it could be undermined if the other parent is not following the same rules. You need to standardize your approach to parenting, from discipline to screen time.
Move Past Your Marriage
Because you share children, you are going to have to see one another frequently. Even when your children become adults, you will have to interact throughout the rest of your lives. You both will want to be at birthday parties, spend time with grandkids, attend graduations, and so much more. It is essential to take the time to process your feelings. Consider getting help from therapy or even support groups to cope and move forward as co-parents.