Take Responsibility for Your Actions

Divorces, especially highly emotional ones, can feel very overwhelming. It can be overwhelming to the point where you are tempted to withdraw from the hard work of unpicking your life with your spouse.

Don’t become a bystander in your own divorce. This is the best way to come away with less than you deserve. You need to do the work and do it well. Listen to the attorney you hired, but when it comes down to it, you need to make your own decisions. You’ll reach a better settlement when you take control and will help you speed up the process do that you can get on with your life.

Don’t Date

If you have a relationship outside of your marriage during your divorce, regardless of when it started, it can make the formal divorce process a little complicated. There may be a risk that any communication you had with the person can be used in a legal proceeding to prove infidelity. If you’ve already started a new relationship, you should consider putting things on hold until the whole process is over and the paperwork is complete. 

Figure Out the Living Situation

Think about where you, your partner, and your children—if you have them—are going to live. Factor in how childcare is going to affect where you live and what kind of accommodations you’ll need. This will help you put together a working budget of your weekly, monthly, and yearly expenses. The goal is to ensure that your plan is doable.

Make Arrangement for the Kids

When it comes to your children, you’ll need to think about how you’ll explain the situation to them. There are many things they’ll need to cope with this disruption in their life. You’ll need to think about who will have primary custody, where the kids will live, and if there will need to be any changes in where they go to school. 

Stay Organized

Yes, you’ll need to think about how you’ll explain the situation to them and consider the tools they’ll need to cope with the upheaval. You’ll need to think about which of you will have primary custody, where the kids will live and any changes in where they go to school. 

A fair and informed divorce agreement is going to depend on having an accurate picture of your finances, assets, and debts. Gather copies of all the important financial documents and access to all account information. These important documents include tax returns for up to 5 years, recent pay stubs, insurance policies, information for retirement accounts and pension accounts, social security estimates, and employment contracts and employer provided benefits for you and your spouse.

Understand Your Biggest Assets

A home is often more than any other purchase, we have strong emotional attachments to the homes we live in. But don’t let those emotions get the better of you regarding property you shared with your spouse.

You many end up discovering that you gave up other assets just to keep a home in which you can no longer afford to live.

While many people believe that their house is their biggest asset when in fact its their retirement or pension account. The court may well consider its future value when dividing assets.

Get Professional Help

As important as your friends and family are, you’re going to benefit from professional help which, at a minimum, is going to take the shape of a divorce attorney or a mediator.

Research and interview at least attorneys in your area and make an informed decision about which one is right for you. At Shaffer Family Law, we have years of experience and are open to talking to you about what you need from an attorney and help you get through this process as smoothly as possible.

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