Tips from Chandler family law attorney

Teenagers are going through a lot with studies, peer pressure, hormonal changes, acne, and much more. To add a divorce can be a lot. Divorce is difficult no matter at what stage you decide to part ways. It is not easy to lose someone you have loved and had a good time together. You’ve had some good times and embraced each other during adverse times too.

Remember, children suffer a lot during a divorce. It becomes even more complicated when they are involved. To process parents parting ways is equally disturbing for children. Often younger children can express their dissatisfaction over divorce and the ongoing changes in their lives, but teenagers go into their shells and become stoic about the whole situation. Younger children’s behavior may vary depending on their personalities; some are likely to wet the bed while others may show in their behaviors. Teenagers are more likely to become distant from parents and show disapproval of their actions. They are more likely to rebel and find respite in substance abuse and other harmful things. They are undergoing several emotions and are more likely to act hastily and hurt their parents. It may be true for some but not all teenagers.

Teenagers are more likely to hide their emotions and their overall opinion. Imagine how teenagers feel when they must see one parent way lesser than the other. No matter how much more time they want to spend with their parent, they become quiet about it. Remember, it is difficult for everyone, and being a parent, it is your responsibility to make your teenager feel loved and part of everything. Here are some ways to ensure your children do not feel neglected but loved and part of your decisions.

Talk To Your Teenager

It is not easy for your teenager to witness both parents part ways. A teenager wants a loving home with both parents, and divorce can surround them with negative thoughts to the extent that they are responsible for it. It would help if you did not wait for them to understand the whole situation independently. It is your responsibility to talk and let them know the reason behind ongoing changes.

Be Supportive

Not only informing them but listening to them without any judgments as they would be affected by it. They must have their friends in the neighborhood or be involved in extracurricular activities such as music, arts, dance, self-defense training, and more. Moving to a new place and leaving behind older connections can be challenging. It would help if you assured them that they would get a chance to meet their old friends.

Give Them Space

Teens meeting family members or friends to share their feelings would allow them to express themselves in a safe environment. Putting restrictions and new ground rules can be challenging for them. It is better to let them have some space. 

Counselor

To seek guidance or help from a counselor to help your teenager through the whole divorce process. This allows teenagers to open up about what’s going on and how they feel about it. This would help them share their feelings and seek support in such critical times.             

Divorce is a long road, and if you are at the crossroads of your marriage, it is time to seek counseling and legal advice. Our attorneys are experts and provide legal advice in your and your family’s best interests. Schedule a consultation with Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030  today.

No matter what one says otherwise, divorces are tough! If children, property, alimony, family pets, and other things are involved, it may be more challenging to sort out depending on the situation. It is hard to go through a divorce, both financially and emotionally. Even if you are familiar with divorce, it is not evident that everyone understands how the divorce process works. Without a thorough understanding, you won’t be able to make an informed decision on whether to litigate in court or settle your divorce out of court.

Each Case is Different

Divorces are different in each circumstance, so you can’t take cues from other people’s experiences. Some cases may be simple without any complications depending on both parties and how they deal with it, whereas the rest may not be. Depending on the extent of divorce, it can last months or even years and can involve many professionals in the process. Sometimes, a case may involve divorce attorneys, accountants, real estate experts, and consultants. Remember, much work goes in before both parties are willing to negotiate what they want from the divorce.

Negotiations Can Turn Tables 

Nearly 90-95% of divorce cases rarely move to trial. So, it entirely depends on both the parties and how much they are willing to negotiate in each circumstance. If a party is unwilling to negotiate to the other party’s terms in a divorce, they will find ways to either try or take it to court. It will all come down to negotiations and what works best for each party in a divorce.

If you are thinking of divorce, it is advisable to make an informed decision at every step of your life. Once you’ve made up your mind, going about the process is the most crucial part of it. This is where legal attorneys can help you navigate through the process. Our legal attorneys can help you at every step during such difficult times of your life. Remember, our experienced attorneys will ensure that every informed decision works out in your and your family’s best interests.

Shaffer Family Law can help and always thinks in your and your family’s best interests. To schedule a consultation, contact Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030.          

When you are in love, age becomes just a number. Couples do not feel the difference in how old or young their partners are, as such things don’t mean anything compared to their relationships. It is said that when two people are dating, their romance overshadows all the differences. That’s how it goes, but honestly, it isn’t as simple as it sounds. There are differences among family members or friends who share different perspectives about such relationships. For example, sometimes family members or friends will judge a couple with more than ten years of difference where the man is older or vice-versa.

Research suggests men prefer to be older in their relationships and are more likely to divorce if they marry an older woman. At the same time, women are more likely to move forward with divorce if they are younger in their relationships. Studies show that people married at a young age are more likely to divorce. For example, if you are just 21 years old and consider marrying someone in their 30s, you could find yourself eventually heading to court. People with educational backgrounds and the same age are less likely to divorce. 

Are couples with age gaps likely to divorce? Well, maybe, but there is no straight answer! Also, there is no single reason to justify it. Several factors contribute to divorce and are not solely based on age. The others could be children, career, finances, and more. If there is a significant age gap between husband and wife, there is a chance that the older among the two may refuse to have children. People are wired differently, and age gap relationships don’t always end up on the same page. They could find themselves in different places in life. One person may be thinking about their career, while the other would be thinking about retirement due to their age. They might have been on the same page at the beginning of their relationship, but as time goes on, things change.

Divorce can be complex! If you or someone you know are thinking about divorcing your partner and need any help, our attorneys can help you navigate and provide you with legal advice in your best interests. You may schedule a consultation (480) 470-3030 to learn how we can help you during this difficult time.

Today, social media has become an essential part of our lives. Social media has both positive and negative effects on relationships. It has the potential to make or break relationships. It is a great platform to make newer connections and go to the extent of knowing them personally. Sometimes you may end up with good relations, while you may not the rest of the time. It keeps you updated about the world around you. Meanwhile, social media can also ruin your healthy relationship with your partner in many ways. It can be a massive roadblock in a healthy relationship.

About half of Americans in a married or committed relationship feel their partners are distracted by cell phones. Also, around 24% of adults in relationships are somewhat bothered by their partners’ spending time on social media. Social media can trigger conflicts among married couples or people in committed relationships. Some feel the partners cheat on them as they start a conversation with an old flame or find a new connection.

Some of the effects are:

No time for each other – If you are married, or in a committed relationship, it becomes crucial to take out time. It often happens that if you start scrolling through Instagram or Facebook feeds, you may end up using it for hours without realizing how much time you have spent. You may end up being on the phone longer than doing other activities. There are chances you might be missing moments that were worth spending. If this is your usual activity, your partner may be irritated by you.

Rekindling old flames – Couples likely have close friends or old flames they interact with on social media by liking their pictures or commenting on them. It can be bothersome for partners as there can be suspicion over the growing closeness on social media posts.

Cheating – Is the partner loyal? Is your partner cheating on you with colleagues, friends, or maybe some new connections? Not having enough time for your partner and spending a reasonable amount of time interacting with new people or others on social media can get you in deep trouble.

Over-sharing – Some people prefer sharing on social media, which can be worrisome if their partners do not like it. If a partner doesn’t prefer to share anything about their timeline of events on social media, the other is enthusiastic about it and shares. It is likely a cause of conflict among them.

Self-conscious – Social media reflects on people living larger than life. People having a good life with money, expensive cars, and whatnot can make some feel they are missing goals. There are chances that partners or couples can think over it and feel bad about themselves.

According to the Pew Research Center, divorce among younger adults is becoming less common while the gray divorce is rising. What do you mean by gray divorce? When an older couple over the age of 50, especially the baby boomers’ generation, after years of togetherness, gets divorced is called a “gray divorce.” A significant share of divorces occurs in people who have been married for 30 years and more.

Divorce is difficult no matter at what stage you decide to part ways. It is not easy to lose someone you have loved and had a good time together. You’ve had some good times and embraced each other during adverse times too. One of the most common myths of gray divorce is it is common among wealthy people. Divorce is a long road, and if you are at the crossroads of your marriage, it is time to seek counseling and legal advice. Our attorneys are experts and provide legal advice in your and your family’s best interests.  

It is always good to weigh in all your options, as divorce can also have some downsides at this stage of life. Financial security at an older age can be demanding as both men and women are more likely to be financially burdened and start all over again. We know no two marriages or circumstances are the same; each one consists of its own set of compromises or understanding to make the marriage work. But sometimes, in relationships, things appear straightforward, whereas, at other times, they don’t.  

Many reasons have led to a rise in gray divorces.

Postponed Divorces – Often, parents decide to stick around in marriages due to their children and divorce once they grow up. The children suffer the most as it becomes difficult to understand that they will not see their parents together. If it becomes hard to stay in the marriage, they decide to part ways.

Empty Nesters – Sometimes, couples do not find enough reasons to stay together once the children move out.    

Repeat Divorces – More likely second, third, or fourth divorce for the baby boomers’ generation. Divorce for people over 50 is 2.5 times more than people who have been married once.

Financial Independence – We are witnessing a shift in divorce trends as studies suggest that women between the ages of 40-69 initiate a divorce 66 percent of the time. The growing financial independence among women makes them decide and think for themselves if they feel unhappy in marriage.

General Dissatisfaction – With delayed retirement ages and longer life spans, people over 50 are unsatisfied in their marriages and more likely to divorce. 

Don’t forget there is increased anxiety and pressure if you are the one who did not initiate the divorce. It can be complex, but our attorneys can help you navigate and provide you with legal advice in your best interests.

Divorce is difficult no matter at what stage you decide to part ways. It is not easy to lose someone you have loved and had a good time together. You’ve had some good times and embraced each other during adverse times too. Valentine’s Day is all about love! It honors Saint Valentine and romanticizes the relationships, reflecting on their importance in life. With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it can be overwhelming for people thinking of filing a divorce or who have been divorced for years. Emotions can override your thoughts or decisions to file a divorce or deal with challenging times if divorced for years. While some people may be unaffected by Valentine’s Day, it can be difficult for some as love is in the air. 

Be it social media flooded with Valentine’s Day posts or all the buzz around discounts/special offers for the day, it can be tough to sail through with all the hype. The emotions are more likely to pull you back and make it hard to go on with your daily schedule. There are many ways to bounce back and focus on yourself than being carried away this Valentine’s Day.

Turn to your single friends or family – It is good to turn to your single friends and plan something together! Be it a lunch or night out, you can always turn to your single friends. People always have someone they can turn to, and it’s truly a blessing. It would help to make outdoor plans or chill with them over a series, movies, or maybe a game night without thinking much. Even if you don’t have any single friends, visit your family as there are no second thoughts about it. Just have a good time with your family. 

Self-care – Being alone at this time of the year can drain you emotionally, especially if you’ve divorced recently. You don’t have to wait for someone to make you feel good. Do it Yourself! Eat for mind and body wellness, exercise, sleep for seven to nine hours on average, meditate, set healthy boundaries, and manage stress. You can do things that make you happy, like spas, cosmetic treatments, or more. These are some ways you can be mindful and take good care. It doesn’t require much time or money but an urge to do things rather than a forced effort that you don’t enjoy.     

Do something creative – You can pick an activity such as gardening, learning a musical instrument, joining social clubs, cooking, painting, volunteering at animal shelters, or maybe connecting with nature at hike trails.

Events – Look for events happening on Valentine’s Day. Like musical concerts, paintball, an artist’s performance, and many other things you can think of. 

Dating App – Today, a dating app is a good tool to find new connections. Building that connection takes some time, but it is good to start. If you are looking for new connections, you could try out your favorite dating app and wait till you get a match! Overall, don’t be so hard on yourself and be happy.

Almost 50 percent of marriages end up in divorce or separation in the US! Divorce can be complex and trigger many emotions that can profoundly impact an individual’s mental and physical health. From the onset to its completion, it comes along with its own set of problems and worries. It may even get complicated when dealing with children, businesses, or property.

Children are the worst affected in a divorce as they would not see their parents together. It may shake a child’s confidence if they will be loved, cared for, and be safe in the future. You must choose either sole or joint legal custody during the process based on your child’s best interest. Research suggests that it is in the child’s best interest to have a healthy relationship with both their parents. Children who have a healthy relationship with both their parents are more likely to thrive than their peers who do not have any relationship.

Emotion check

Being mindful and keeping emotions under check during such difficult times is not easy. Think about providing a healthy and safe environment for your child’s overall development.

Understand your child’s needs

It is important to understand what your child needs. Your child may be deeply affected by the divorce, and it may reflect in their behavior and attitude during such difficult times. It is crucial to provide a healthy and safe environment for your child without affecting their routines, such as school schedule, social activities, and more.

Decide for yourself on the custody

Make your own decision on the custody while keeping in mind all the possibilities. Seek legal counsel’s help, so you are not alone in this process.

Focus on your child’s upbringing

Never speak ill of the other parent in front of your child and make them a part of disputes or issues. However, keep your child well informed about your decisions or day-to-day activities. Never put your child in a position where they would have to choose between their parents or show where their allegiance lies. If your child wants to talk, then listen. 

Attorneys at Shaffer Family Law in Chandler will help you understand what is essential and what is not to make decisions that matter. Give us a call at (480) 470-3030 to let us help you in the process.

Reference

Zemmelman, M. (2018). Building a parenting agreement that works. Retrieved from https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=7QtrDwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PT15&dq=how+to+build+a+healthy+parenting+agreement+joint+custody+family+law&ots=p8W1MPlMCy&sig=0NK_VavzOffc2tbB23-iQ2HwYVg#v=onepage&q=how%20to%20build%20a%20healthy%20parenting%20agreement%20joint%20custody%20family%20law&f=false

Divorce is not easy, and it is true! No matter how much one agrees or disagrees, divorce can sometimes drain you out completely. On the one hand, you would be emotionally overwhelmed, while on the other, it would overburden you with responsibilities. It can be challenging from all perspectives and may deter you completely. It is the most crucial time, and the only way is to be mindful and contemplative. These hard times require you to pull yourself together and overcome every obstacle coming your way. 

However, emotions may override you and not let you think through in such times. You may end up doing things that you shouldn’t have and can affect your decisions in the future. Some of the things you should keep in mind that can help you are:

• Do not act hastily – During tough times, it is suggested to be mindful and not act hastily. Do not vent your anger and do things that can further complicate your situation. Every decision needs to be contemplated before it is executed.
• Always seek legal advice – It is important to seek the right legal advice in these crucial times. It is not good to act or decide without knowing its consequences. Our team of experts can advise you in your best interests.
• Don’t hide any information – Being transparent about your case to your attorney, including every detail, can be helpful. Sometimes people do not share some information relating to their case without understanding how useful it may be in the future. Do not hide any relevant information from your attorney, as it may help your case.
• Say no to legal advice from non-legal entities – Your friends and family may be concerned about you and try to give suggestions, but it is always good to get legal advice only from attorneys. They are the right ones to guide you through such difficult times.
• Don’t have unrealistic expectations – Don’t set your expectations too high and be open to negotiations. Finding a middle ground can be beneficial for everyone that is involved. You want a smooth process without any complications further in the whole case.

If you are thinking of ending your marriage, you are likely facing one of the most difficult decisions of your life. We can help you navigate the process and work toward a solution in your best interests. You may contact Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 to schedule a consultation.

People ask many questions before or during the divorce process, including “does it matter who files for divorce first?” Is there any legal advantage to filing for divorce first? This can depend on the state and legal jurisdiction in which you live. For Shaffer Family Law couples, there is no evident benefit filing first—although some minor distinctions can be noted.

Perhaps the most crucial reason to file for divorce first is becoming the “petitioner,” or the person asking for the divorce. The “respondent” is the person receiving the divorce summons.

Although the petitioner can make their case first during divorce proceedings, there is no clear advantage. Opening the divorce request only appears to award marginal benefits to the petitioner, including giving your attorney a head start on freezing jointly held assets. This can be for those worried about their ex selling off possessions and disappearing.

So, whether you are the petitioner or the respondent in a divorce case, divorce will be challenging. Luckily, a knowledgeable family attorney can help you every step of the way. When you’re going through a divorce, an attorney can help you protect your rights. At Shaffer Family Law, we’re here to help you protect your new future. Call us at (480) 470-3030 to get started.

In Arizona the law favors custody arrangements that allow children to spend time with both parents. Research shows having access to both parents is in the child’s best interests, as kids with a close relationship tend to thrive compared to peers who don’t get time with both parents. But there are cases where a child refuses to spend time with a parent. If you’re granted primary child custody, you need to comply with the visitation order issued by the court. But if you find yourself constantly fighting with a child every time they’re supposed to visit their other parent, what are your options?

First, it’s you need to understand the legitimate reasons your child is so reluctant to visit. Common reasons children refuse visitation include:

·       They miss their home or feel uncomfortable in the other parent’s home

·       The other parent’s house is far away from their friends or school

·       New rules or behavioral expectations are uncomfortable/unfamiliar

·       Their parent has a new partner, who may have children

·       The child and the other parent do not have a close relationship

·       The child blames the other parent for the divorce

It is also normal for children to express their objections as they turn into teenagers. Most are involved in extracurricular activities and want to participate in outings with friends. Unfortunately, visitation with the other parent may interfere with these events. While some objections are worked out by making the transition from one household to another less disruptive, others may require more analysis. You should consider getting help from a counselor or therapist. In some cases, modifying the visitation order may be needed.