Tips from Chandler family law attorney

Social Media Effects on Marriage, Chandler Arizona

Today, social media has become an essential part of our lives. Social media has both positive and negative effects on relationships. It has the potential to make or break relationships. It is a great platform to make newer connections and go to the extent of knowing them personally. Sometimes you may end up with good relations, while you may not the rest of the time. It keeps you updated about the world around you. Meanwhile, social media can also ruin your healthy relationship with your partner in many ways. It can be a massive roadblock in a healthy relationship.

About half of Americans in a married or committed relationship feel their partners are distracted by cell phones. Also, around 24% of adults in relationships are somewhat bothered by their partners’ spending time on social media. Social media can trigger conflicts among married couples or people in committed relationships. Some feel the partners cheat on them as they start a conversation with an old flame or find a new connection.

Some of the effects are:

No time for each other – If you are married, or in a committed relationship, it becomes crucial to take out time. It often happens that if you start scrolling through Instagram or Facebook feeds, you may end up using it for hours without realizing how much time you have spent. You may end up being on the phone longer than doing other activities. There are chances you might be missing moments that were worth spending. If this is your usual activity, your partner may be irritated by you.

Rekindling old flames – Couples likely have close friends or old flames they interact with on social media by liking their pictures or commenting on them. It can be bothersome for partners as there can be suspicion over the growing closeness on social media posts.

Cheating – Is the partner loyal? Is your partner cheating on you with colleagues, friends, or maybe some new connections? Not having enough time for your partner and spending a reasonable amount of time interacting with new people or others on social media can get you in deep trouble.

Over-sharing – Some people prefer sharing on social media, which can be worrisome if their partners do not like it. If a partner doesn’t prefer to share anything about their timeline of events on social media, the other is enthusiastic about it and shares. It is likely a cause of conflict among them.

Self-conscious – Social media reflects on people living larger than life. People having a good life with money, expensive cars, and whatnot can make some feel they are missing goals. There are chances that partners or couples can think over it and feel bad about themselves.

What is Gray Divorce? Chandler Arizona

According to the Pew Research Center, divorce among younger adults is becoming less common while the gray divorce is rising. What do you mean by gray divorce? When an older couple over the age of 50, especially the baby boomers’ generation, after years of togetherness, gets divorced is called a “gray divorce.” A significant share of divorces occurs in people who have been married for 30 years and more.

Divorce is difficult no matter at what stage you decide to part ways. It is not easy to lose someone you have loved and had a good time together. You’ve had some good times and embraced each other during adverse times too. One of the most common myths of gray divorce is it is common among wealthy people. Divorce is a long road, and if you are at the crossroads of your marriage, it is time to seek counseling and legal advice. Our attorneys are experts and provide legal advice in your and your family’s best interests.  

It is always good to weigh in all your options, as divorce can also have some downsides at this stage of life. Financial security at an older age can be demanding as both men and women are more likely to be financially burdened and start all over again. We know no two marriages or circumstances are the same; each one consists of its own set of compromises or understanding to make the marriage work. But sometimes, in relationships, things appear straightforward, whereas, at other times, they don’t.  

Many reasons have led to a rise in gray divorces.

Postponed Divorces – Often, parents decide to stick around in marriages due to their children and divorce once they grow up. The children suffer the most as it becomes difficult to understand that they will not see their parents together. If it becomes hard to stay in the marriage, they decide to part ways.

Empty Nesters – Sometimes, couples do not find enough reasons to stay together once the children move out.    

Repeat Divorces – More likely second, third, or fourth divorce for the baby boomers’ generation. Divorce for people over 50 is 2.5 times more than people who have been married once.

Financial Independence – We are witnessing a shift in divorce trends as studies suggest that women between the ages of 40-69 initiate a divorce 66 percent of the time. The growing financial independence among women makes them decide and think for themselves if they feel unhappy in marriage.

General Dissatisfaction – With delayed retirement ages and longer life spans, people over 50 are unsatisfied in their marriages and more likely to divorce. 

Don’t forget there is increased anxiety and pressure if you are the one who did not initiate the divorce. It can be complex, but our attorneys can help you navigate and provide you with legal advice in your best interests.

Surviving Valentine’s Day after a Divorce, Chandler Arizona

Divorce is difficult no matter at what stage you decide to part ways. It is not easy to lose someone you have loved and had a good time together. You’ve had some good times and embraced each other during adverse times too. Valentine’s Day is all about love! It honors Saint Valentine and romanticizes the relationships, reflecting on their importance in life. With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it can be overwhelming for people thinking of filing a divorce or who have been divorced for years. Emotions can override your thoughts or decisions to file a divorce or deal with challenging times if divorced for years. While some people may be unaffected by Valentine’s Day, it can be difficult for some as love is in the air. 

Be it social media flooded with Valentine’s Day posts or all the buzz around discounts/special offers for the day, it can be tough to sail through with all the hype. The emotions are more likely to pull you back and make it hard to go on with your daily schedule. There are many ways to bounce back and focus on yourself than being carried away this Valentine’s Day.

Turn to your single friends or family – It is good to turn to your single friends and plan something together! Be it a lunch or night out, you can always turn to your single friends. People always have someone they can turn to, and it’s truly a blessing. It would help to make outdoor plans or chill with them over a series, movies, or maybe a game night without thinking much. Even if you don’t have any single friends, visit your family as there are no second thoughts about it. Just have a good time with your family. 

Self-care – Being alone at this time of the year can drain you emotionally, especially if you’ve divorced recently. You don’t have to wait for someone to make you feel good. Do it Yourself! Eat for mind and body wellness, exercise, sleep for seven to nine hours on average, meditate, set healthy boundaries, and manage stress. You can do things that make you happy, like spas, cosmetic treatments, or more. These are some ways you can be mindful and take good care. It doesn’t require much time or money but an urge to do things rather than a forced effort that you don’t enjoy.     

Do something creative – You can pick an activity such as gardening, learning a musical instrument, joining social clubs, cooking, painting, volunteering at animal shelters, or maybe connecting with nature at hike trails.

Events – Look for events happening on Valentine’s Day. Like musical concerts, paintball, an artist’s performance, and many other things you can think of. 

Dating App – Today, a dating app is a good tool to find new connections. Building that connection takes some time, but it is good to start. If you are looking for new connections, you could try out your favorite dating app and wait till you get a match! Overall, don’t be so hard on yourself and be happy.

A Healthy Parenting Guide for Divorcing Parents, Chandler Arizona

Almost 50 percent of marriages end up in divorce or separation in the US! Divorce can be complex and trigger many emotions that can profoundly impact an individual’s mental and physical health. From the onset to its completion, it comes along with its own set of problems and worries. It may even get complicated when dealing with children, businesses, or property.

Children are the worst affected in a divorce as they would not see their parents together. It may shake a child’s confidence if they will be loved, cared for, and be safe in the future. You must choose either sole or joint legal custody during the process based on your child’s best interest. Research suggests that it is in the child’s best interest to have a healthy relationship with both their parents. Children who have a healthy relationship with both their parents are more likely to thrive than their peers who do not have any relationship.

Emotion check

Being mindful and keeping emotions under check during such difficult times is not easy. Think about providing a healthy and safe environment for your child’s overall development.

Understand your child’s needs

It is important to understand what your child needs. Your child may be deeply affected by the divorce, and it may reflect in their behavior and attitude during such difficult times. It is crucial to provide a healthy and safe environment for your child without affecting their routines, such as school schedule, social activities, and more.

Decide for yourself on the custody

Make your own decision on the custody while keeping in mind all the possibilities. Seek legal counsel’s help, so you are not alone in this process.

Focus on your child’s upbringing

Never speak ill of the other parent in front of your child and make them a part of disputes or issues. However, keep your child well informed about your decisions or day-to-day activities. Never put your child in a position where they would have to choose between their parents or show where their allegiance lies. If your child wants to talk, then listen. 

Attorneys at Shaffer Family Law in Chandler will help you understand what is essential and what is not to make decisions that matter. Give us a call at (480) 470-3030 to let us help you in the process.

Reference

Zemmelman, M. (2018). Building a parenting agreement that works. Retrieved from https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=7QtrDwAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PT15&dq=how+to+build+a+healthy+parenting+agreement+joint+custody+family+law&ots=p8W1MPlMCy&sig=0NK_VavzOffc2tbB23-iQ2HwYVg#v=onepage&q=how%20to%20build%20a%20healthy%20parenting%20agreement%20joint%20custody%20family%20law&f=false

Common Mistakes You Can Make During a Divorce, Chandler Arizona

Divorce is not easy, and it is true! No matter how much one agrees or disagrees, divorce can sometimes drain you out completely. On the one hand, you would be emotionally overwhelmed, while on the other, it would overburden you with responsibilities. It can be challenging from all perspectives and may deter you completely. It is the most crucial time, and the only way is to be mindful and contemplative. These hard times require you to pull yourself together and overcome every obstacle coming your way. 

However, emotions may override you and not let you think through in such times. You may end up doing things that you shouldn’t have and can affect your decisions in the future. Some of the things you should keep in mind that can help you are:

  • Do not act hastily – During tough times, it is suggested to be mindful and not act hastily. Do not vent your anger and do things that can further complicate your situation. Every decision needs to be contemplated before it is executed.
  • Always seek legal advice – It is important to seek the right legal advice in these crucial times. It is not good to act or decide without knowing its consequences. Our team of experts can advise you in your best interests.
  • Don’t hide any information – Being transparent about your case to your attorney, including every detail, can be helpful. Sometimes people do not share some information relating to their case without understanding how useful it may be in the future. Do not hide any relevant information from your attorney, as it may help your case.
  • Say no to legal advice from non-legal entities – Your friends and family may be concerned about you and try to give suggestions, but it is always good to get legal advice only from attorneys. They are the right ones to guide you through such difficult times.
  • Don’t have unrealistic expectations – Don’t set your expectations too high and be open to negotiations. Finding a middle ground can be beneficial for everyone that is involved. You want a smooth process without any complications further in the whole case.

If you are thinking of ending your marriage, you are likely facing one of the most difficult decisions of your life. We can help you navigate the process and work toward a solution in your best interests. You may contact Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 to schedule a consultation.

Who Files For Divorce First? Chandler Arizona

People ask many questions before or during the divorce process, including “does it matter who files for divorce first?” Is there any legal advantage to filing for divorce first? This can depend on the state and legal jurisdiction in which you live. For Shaffer Family Law couples, there is no evident benefit filing first—although some minor distinctions can be noted.

Perhaps the most crucial reason to file for divorce first is becoming the “petitioner,” or the person asking for the divorce. The “respondent” is the person receiving the divorce summons.

Although the petitioner can make their case first during divorce proceedings, there is no clear advantage. Opening the divorce request only appears to award marginal benefits to the petitioner, including giving your attorney a head start on freezing jointly held assets. This can be for those worried about their ex selling off possessions and disappearing.

So, whether you are the petitioner or the respondent in a divorce case, divorce will be challenging. Luckily, a knowledgeable family attorney can help you every step of the way. When you’re going through a divorce, an attorney can help you protect your rights. At Shaffer Family Law, we’re here to help you protect your new future. Call us at (480) 470-3030 to get started.

My Child Refuses to Visit Their Parent: Now What do I do? Chandler Arizona

In Arizona the law favors custody arrangements that allow children to spend time with both parents. Research shows having access to both parents is in the child’s best interests, as kids with a close relationship tend to thrive compared to peers who don’t get time with both parents. But there are cases where a child refuses to spend time with a parent. If you’re granted primary child custody, you need to comply with the visitation order issued by the court. But if you find yourself constantly fighting with a child every time they’re supposed to visit their other parent, what are your options?

First, it’s you need to understand the legitimate reasons your child is so reluctant to visit. Common reasons children refuse visitation include:

·       They miss their home or feel uncomfortable in the other parent’s home

·       The other parent’s house is far away from their friends or school

·       New rules or behavioral expectations are uncomfortable/unfamiliar

·       Their parent has a new partner, who may have children

·       The child and the other parent do not have a close relationship

·       The child blames the other parent for the divorce

It is also normal for children to express their objections as they turn into teenagers. Most are involved in extracurricular activities and want to participate in outings with friends. Unfortunately, visitation with the other parent may interfere with these events. While some objections are worked out by making the transition from one household to another less disruptive, others may require more analysis. You should consider getting help from a counselor or therapist. In some cases, modifying the visitation order may be needed.

Should you include grandparent visitation be in a child custody order? Chandler Arizona

Divorce is a complicated process that impacts almost every member of a family. Beyond immediate family members, it can also affect grandparents and other extended family members close to the kids. Parents may disagree when it comes to their children seeing their grandparents after a divorce.

Grandparents in Arizona who have not been able to visit with their grandchildren should explore their right to seek visitation. Specific circumstances are allowing different family members to seek the court’s intervention. Litigation and court battles can harm children. Grandparents should weigh the potential benefits over the possible negative consequences. It largely depends on how old the children are and their relationship with the grandparents. Some families can decide outside of the court and negotiate with the parents and grandparents.

Of course, it all comes down to the best interests of the children. Depending on the complexity of the child custody case and visitation matters, many people benefit from hiring an experienced attorney who can guide them and assist them through every step. Give the attorneys at Shaffer Family Law in Chandler a call today at (480) 470-3030.

Things Can Help You During Your Divorce, Chandler Arizona

No one expects their marriage to fail, which means they also do not have plans to get through the divorce process in one piece. Unfortunately, it is sometimes necessary to get the life you deserve. If you find yourself preparing to dissolve your marriage, do not worry. The attorneys at Shaffer Family Law in Chandler can help you along the way. You can do few things to make it a more straightforward process.

Take care of yourself.

The best thing you can do while getting a divorce is taking care of yourself. You can do this by exercising, keeping a journal, and seeking out a counselor. Taking care of yourself can help you stay focused and help you come out of this mentally and physically stronger than going in.

Keep emotions in check.

People can make questionable decisions when their emotions are high. It would be best if you kept feelings out of the divorce process. Of course, this is easier said than done, but the outcome of your case can be better if you view your divorce as a business transaction rather than an emotional one.

Care of your children

If you have kids, you need to make them a priority. Divorce is complex and will be hard on the whole family, and children tend to have a difficult time with it.

Seek help and support.

There is no need to go through the divorce process alone. You have the right to legal counsel. Legal counsel can help you as much as you want and will work thoroughly to get you a fair and balanced settlement. If you are interested in learning how the attorneys at Shaffer Family Law can help you, give our Chandler office a call at (480) 470-3030 today!

What to do When You Own a Business During a Divorce, Chandler Arizona

Owning a business with your spouse does not always mean the marriage will be successful. Being a business owner is stressful and often comes with disagreements when you own it with a partner. A lot of people end up divorcing because of this stress. When this happens, both partners need to decide what to do with the business. There are three available options:

One Spouse Buys-Out the Other

A buy-out is a common way to divide a family business. If only one person chooses to continue running the company, they will need to purchase the other spouse’s interest in the company. The person keeping the business will need to afford the buy-out, with or without financing.

Both Sell the Business

Sometimes no one is interested in running the business, which means they can sell the business and split the profit. It may take some time to find an appropriate buyer for the company, and both spouses will need to agree on an offer.

Both Stay On As Co-Owners

While it is not as common, some spouses who divorce without drama or animosity may decide to continue running the business together. It does require a lot of cooperation and constructive communication. So if both spouses choose to stay on as co-owners, they will need to emotions aside and work together.

Getting divorced and need help with the process? Give Shaffer Family Law in Chandler a call at (480) 470-3030 to discuss your options and get started on your journey. 

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