Tips from Chandler family law attorney

When two people have decided they can’t live together, they look for reasons to part ways. They no longer feel loved or spend time with each other as they used to. Living like roommates and doing their things without spending time with each other. It is sad knowing that the marriage is coming to an end, and the most common way is divorce. At the same time, annulment is another way but may not be feasible for every other case. The marriage can be annulled only when it was considered illegal from the beginning of it. To get the marriage annulled, the spouse must prove that the marriage was illegitimate from the start. So, how does it happen? Can any marriage be annulled? No, not really. An annulment can happen only if

• Underage: One of the spouses is underage to marry but still married.
• Incest: If both spouses are related to each other by blood, such marriage can be annulled.
• Polygamy: If the spouse intentionally or unintentionally gets married again while already being married.
• Fraud – Sometimes, people get married by falsely promising things that they never meant or wanted to fulfill in the first place. They lied or had been hiding their true intentions in such matters for a long time. For instance, if the person is sterile or infertile and can’t have children or is deceitful about their criminal records.
• Unsound mind: If the spouse was under drugs, highly intoxicated, and incapable of making any appropriate decision for themselves, then the marriage can get annulled.
• Threat: If the person blackmails, threatens, or coerces their partner into marriage, it can be annulled.

To get the marriage annulled, you need to meet the legal requirements. Meanwhile, in case of divorce in a no-fault state, the couple seeking a divorce does not have to prove any wrongdoing by either party for divorce. If you want to file for a divorce in Arizona, either party must have lived in the state or the county. It can become more complicated with assets and custody of children in the family. Shaffer Family Law is committed to protecting your marital rights. Our attorneys ensure the property division is fair by identifying all relevant factors and assigning ownership and correct valuations to all assets and liabilities.

How Can We Help Your Case?

Our attorneys understand that the outcome of your divorce will affect the quality of the rest of your family’s lives. We focus on assisting people facing these difficult decisions regarding their home life, property, and parenthood. We are committed to helping our clients through these challenges with a compassionate yet uncompromising representation. We thoroughly sit down with the parties involved to help you understand the decisions and their impact on you and your family. We aim to ensure you understand the process and make decisions that benefit you. Mediation and negotiated settlements are almost always better alternatives to courtroom litigation. If litigation is necessary, we will fight aggressively, without hesitation, to protect your rights. So schedule a consultation with us at (480) 470-3030 today.

Marriage is a sacred and beautiful institution and the coming together of two people who love each other. People get married thinking that they want to spend the rest of their lives with their partners. But not everything we dream turn into reality, or even if it does is often short-lived. You marry your favorite person, thinking how wonderful the rest of your life will be for both, but now you realize it may not be accurate. When you love someone, you may ignore the red flags or think of it as no big deal at the moment and can turn it around. However, this disillusionment soon crawls into your heart and grows in you, day in and day out.

Each one’s story may never resemble the other, but some signs can be common for all; it’s just how you look at it. Being mindful of your surroundings helps you see through things that have been ignored for a long time. 

• Grow impatient and less empathetic toward 

When your partner is impatient and insensitive toward your feelings, they are not on the same page and do not understand and respect your perception and emotions. 

• More arguments

When the couple starts arguing over small things, it affects almost everything, and things go downhill with the relationship. It is a cause of worry and must be carefully addressed to understand what’s happening.

• Conversations turn into heated arguments and shouting

It may start as a conversation but swiftly turns into shouting with every other conversation. The high-pitched arguments turn ugly as both want to be correct and express their opinion.

• Stop sharing small things

How was the day like? Anything interesting? It can affect their relationship if the couple stops discussing their individual lives, work, or social. When the person realizes their partner is uninterested in their conversation or anything happening, it can stop them from sharing it.

• Do not want to spend time together

You find ways to spend individual me-time rather than doing something together. If a partner suggests an activity and you don’t want and decline, not only because you don’t want to, but you are not okay with doing it with your partner, too, due to whatever is happening.

• Thoughts like what if there was someone else instead of your partner

When you have thoughts that instead of your partner, was there someone else? What if your partner were not behaving the way they are, and if someone else was in their place, what would have been the response?

If you feel you might have married the wrong person and are seeking to file a divorce, our law offices can help! Contact our divorce attorney in Chandler today.

Are you a workaholic? Do you enjoy what you do? It is the most wonderful thing and keeps you moving daily. Not everyone likes what work they do, but it is great that you found your calling. Many working professionals spend most of their awake time in the office from Monday to Friday. However, if you are a workaholic, then it proceeds beyond. Some people may work more than 40 hours and feel engaged and fulfilled, whereas others may feel the same within the required hours. Sometimes, people are obliged to work for a more extended period due to a project. Meanwhile, at other times, some people may feel compelled to work more and more as much as they can exceed their required work.

Watch Out for These Signs

When the lines between work and personal life become blurry, work-life balance goes for a toss. You may spend more and more time at work than at home being with your partner. Spending quality time together and being engaged in your spouse’s life is essential. Taking time is vital for a healthy relationship; if you fail to do it, it is a sign of growing distance between the two. It is a huge red flag if you or your partner do not know what’s happening in each other’s lives.

• Puts work first than a relationship

Opting out of activities you would typically engage in, like dinner dates and movie nights, is a sign of ignoring your relationship.

• Too tired to spend time with spouse

Once back from working long hours at the office, it is likely that you are tired and do not want to go out or do something together, whereas the spouse has been waiting for it, which can be disappointing.

• No conversation other than work

If there’s nothing to discuss besides work, it is a clear sign that you may be growing apart from your spouse.

• Spouse, the work therapist

If you turn to your spouse for all the work-related minuscule things and constantly drop everything to them, including negatives, it can be a lot for them. Seeking advice may be a good idea, but you must give them a break.

A line must be drawn as work-life balance is essential. Bringing work to home or spending long hours at the office daily can affect your relationship with your spouse. If you are a workaholic or your spouse is, identify signs and try to talk things out. How do you strengthen your relationship with the spouse? Spend more time together by participating in fun activities together. Some introspection, time management, and openly conveying each other’s concerns can be the beginning of it.

Property division is always complex during a divorce, but if one is emotionally attached to it, it becomes intense. Being on the same page with your ex can be tricky and a long road, but it is unimaginable if you have a pet, especially a dog. Who doesn’t love them? You take care of them, buy them toys and treats, and take them to play dates in the park; they are not children but your family. If divorce goes down, then like other divisions of assets, family pets become the center of divorce disputes, just like children.

Pets Are Family

It can be as complicated as other matters as some states consider it personal property and are divided like other community/marital property such as a home or a car. Research suggests that around 40% of the population of pet owners are not willing to give up their four-legged friends. Dogs are most loved just like any other family member, which can lead to heated arguments among the family members. Sometimes, it can be otherwise that pet parents can manage the visitation schedule and custody as both want to continue loving and living with their dog.

How To Decide?

Courts are most likely to consider the ownership and the monetary value of a dog, cat, lizard, snake, or companion. Pet owners do not think of their dogs or pets that way. For some people, dogs comprise their whole life and revolve around their dogs. A judge will base their decision on ownership and monetary value. However, separating a pet from a child when mom and dad are fighting can be devastating in families. The child can be emotionally attached to the dog or pet, and separating them can affect the child’s mental amid their parents’ separation. Children often bond with pets while growing up.

In some cases, the custody of a dog is very clear: if one spouse had the pet dog before the marriage, then the dog belongs to that spouse. However, if the dog was adopted together after the marriage, it may be considered community property. It will be a shared asset during the divorce, and custody must be agreed upon by both parties and awarded by the judge. Whoever owns or cares for the dog belongs to that spouse. If both have been taking care of the dog, then there are many options, like sharing the dog among the two houses, just like their children’s custody.

When it comes to marriage, separation isn’t the same as divorce, even if you are slightly aware of it. Separation means the spouse lives separately but is still legally married unless you get a judgment of divorce. It is not just living apart; you need a court to approve your decision.

Legal separation allows the spouse to continue receiving health benefits, whereas in divorce, it ends. It even maintains your marriage status, but if a spouse wants to marry someone else, they must file a divorce. States consider spouses in legal separation as related and can be contacted during emergencies. Meanwhile, if the couple is divorced, they are no longer associated with each other. Spouses who proceed with legal separation are bound to pay off the debt undertaken in a marriage. However, if any spouse undertakes a new debt, that will be solely the individual’s responsibility rather than both. Legal separation preserves property rights when the spouse dies, but not in a divorce. The legal separation process depends on the state and can vary from six months to a year. 

If you are looking for divorce or legal separation advice, our legal experts can help you. Our experienced family law attorneys can help your case by working in the client’s best interests. Schedule a consultation with Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 today.

Are you in a toxic marriage? What does a toxic marriage look like? A toxic marriage means when both partners cause unhealthy mental, physical, and emotional issues. The problems gradually become more significant than you have ever imagined. Sometimes, a toxic marriage may appear happier from the outside, but that’s not the reality. But remember, there will be subtle signs of toxicity in a marriage for which you must be mindful and look out. The most common symptoms are physical abuse, substance abuse, adultery, and desertion. A toxic marriage can make you bitter; you may be depressed, sad, and always think negatively. There is no hope left, and the distances grow without realizing the importance of making things better for each other.

Signs to Watch Out

• Lack of communication

If you and your partner do not communicate each other’s feelings and misunderstandings, they will likely get worse. You do not even realize how much damage it can cause your marriage if one is not communicating with the other. If both become comfortable in their respective spaces and do not wish to share, their emotions and feelings will escalate, which will not be positive.

• Stalking phone

If either of the spouses stalks the other’s phone, you do not have enough trust in your partner and look for proof to validate and re-establish that trust. One constantly checks the other spouse’s phone for signs that the person is hiding anything, cheating, etc.

• Jealousy

If your partner constantly wants to monitor where and with whom you go every hour of the day, they may be insecure and want to exert control.

• Blame game

If both are angry and do not want to understand the situation, keep blaming each other. For one, the other spouse may be doing things constantly triggering the other, while the other may be letting out what they feel about the former’s actions. It can be a constant loop where the end may seem unreachable.

• Constant fighting

The partners may constantly fight each other as their minor issues might not have been resolved or swept under the carpet, triggering the former matters. They may continuously fight each other as neither is willing to give up and leave their stand as each one thinks the other is responsible and at fault.

• Minor issues become bigger

The relationship is so toxic that miscommunication and no common understanding can trigger even the smallest things that do not require attention in life. It can lead to misunderstandings, escalating the non-issues to more significant problems in life.

• Exhausted

With the constant fighting and blame game, both people in the relationship can likely feel overwhelmed. There is no joy as you constantly fight with your spouse and always feel sick.

• Depression

If your relationship goes down the drain, there is no way you can be happy or wholeheartedly enjoy your life. A part of your life is not in peace, which can make you feel depressed and sad.

• Social life

You may stop enjoying yourself or going out and even talk negatively about your partner.

• No emotional support

You no longer depend on your partner for emotional support as they will not understand and even be present. 

If you believe you are in a toxic marriage and are considering divorce, our experienced attorneys can help. We understand it can be challenging for you, and we are here to help your case in every possible way. Schedule an appointment with Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 today.  

No two people experience divorce the same way. However, it is excruciating, no matter what people say otherwise. It is mentally and physically challenging and overwhelming with everything going around. As you file your divorce papers with the attorney, paying attention to your mind and body is essential. We understand how overwhelming it can be for a person to be dealing with everything on their own. Even if you have children or not, parting ways with someone you have loved can be most painful. If children are involved, it becomes more challenging and overwhelming as you would have to ensure that children’s relationship with your ex isn’t impacted.

• Stress

It is an emotionally draining and stressful event that can make you lose yourself. When stressed, one can likely skip their routine, forget to eat, and lie sobbing on their bed or couch.

• Grief and Depression

Many people may feel like a failure or nothing good is coming around and overthinking what led you to this point in life with your ex.

• Drastic Weight Change

Gaining or losing weight can be common for people during or after the divorce. A stressful and anxious phase can make you either put on weight or lose because some people may turn to comfort foods while others may not eat at all.

• Not Eating or Sleeping Well

If one is feeling depressed or sad, they are likely to skip their meals, exercise, sleep, or anything. Everything can demotivate the person, further affecting their productivity throughout the day.

If the divorce process impacts your health and you need someone to take over your legal hassles, our experienced attorneys can help. We understand it can be challenging for you, and we are here to help your case in every possible way. Schedule an appointment with Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 today.  

If you think it is somewhat complicated, it is not. It simply means sleeping away from your partner to get better sleep. One may sleep in a separate room and may have different sleeping patterns or arrangements from their partner as it disturbs their sleep. It can be beneficial for both by giving ample space to each other and respecting the sleeping arrangements. For instance, if a person prefers to sleep in extremely cold temperatures while their partner looks for many comforters in that temperature. It can become difficult to manage in such situations and may turn into a warzone where one wants something while the other partner may not like it, eventually affecting their sleep.

Sleep is Important for Everyone

Sleep divorce may sound negative, but it has been a blessing in disguise for many people as it has helped people come closer. Sometimes a partner may snore, and the other may not be able to sleep during such loud noise. It can be troublesome and disrupt sleep, causing a bone of contention. Sleep is critical for your body to get ready for the next day. If one doesn’t get good sleep, it can lead to unproductivity and disrupt the entire day.

Moreover, insomnia, body heat, restless legs, etc., are other reasons that can disrupt a couple’s sleep. These reasons can make happy couples sleep apart in separate rooms, beds, or other spaces. It doesn’t need paperwork but different sleeping arrangements to improve their sleep. Couples may have a separate sleeping schedule, or simply sleeping on the wrong side of the bed can irk them.

What is a Sleep Divorce?

Sleep divorce is not paperwork but simply an arrangement between couples collectively deciding to sleep apart. Sometimes the word divorce may put off any partner; however, it may help everyone in the long run for a healthy relationship. But sleeping apart can be difficult as it may affect your healthy relationship. But a thoughtful, laid-out plan that balances quality time with each other without becoming a bone of contention in the relationship can be helpful. If you feel sleeping apart can ruin the marriage but sleeping together with many issues will not, in the long run, may do it. Discussing everything with your partner before moving forward with any arrangements is always a good idea. Always start with healthy and positive things about the relationship. Then avoid targeting your partner and blaming them for everything, even if their habits may be the reason. Try spending some good quality time together and appreciate each other for understanding. The purpose is not to let the distance affect your relationship but to schedule more time with each other to maintain a healthy relationship.

Parting ways with someone you loved and never thought would leave your side can be brutal. It may take a while for anyone to process everything. Dealing with legal procedures’ emotional and physical stress can overwhelm anyone. It is exhausting as such life-changing events can affect your health. If your ex-spouse has been a narcissist, it makes matters even worse.

Is Your Ex a Narcissist?

A narcissist is an ordinary person, just like any other human. However, personality traits reflect self-centeredness, arrogance, lack of empathy, and no consideration for others’ feelings. They are in love with themselves and are unaware of others’ feelings. They want to be constantly praised and need attention and importance in another person’s life. They may resist changing their behavior and not find any fault within themselves. It can be hard sometimes to see these traits as the person can be delusional and dodge any questions. If you can find out about these traits, finding people in your life with these existing traits becomes a bit easy. Honestly, it can be challenging to follow standard rules when it comes to co-parenting with a narcissist. It can become a nightmare; divorce is tough, and dealing with a narcissist can worsen it.

No co-parenting but parallel parenting

It can be difficult to say co-parenting exists with a narcissists as their own opinions can preoccupy them, and often ignore the needs and demands of their child. This is simply unacceptable as it hampers your child’s overall development. So, rather than co-parenting, it may turn into parallel parenting. We understand it can be the most difficult but make peace with it. However, you have parted ways for reasons and let it be rather than fighting over co-parenting. When the child is at your home, instead of focusing on the overwhelming and stressful stuff, develop confidence and values for their overall development. Being compassionate and mindful of others’ feelings can be important so that inculcating mindfulness habits can help children.

Be the safe parent

A stressful and anxious environment can unease the child’s overall growth. Be the parent where your child learns from a calm and peaceful environment. Children can grow in a stable and loving environment. Show your children that you earn their respect by showing love and care and teaching mindful habits.

Let kids be themselves

Do not intently bring up other parent’s narcissistic behavior. Children grow at different stages and do not understand adult problems, responsibilities, etc. Your focus should be on taking care of your child during developmental stages.

Less communication

Do not increase your stress by interacting with such narcissists. Keep your communication to the point and limit it. You have no reason to react and trouble your state of mind. Always try and avoid conflict; any personal attack, commentary, or comments should be avoided, and try to ignore the narcissist if coming.

Divorce is hard, no matter what people say otherwise. It is physically and emotionally overwhelming. Losing someone you’ve loved and believing they would always be there for you can break you completely. It breaks your trust and makes it difficult to trust someone again. Reasons can differ for different individuals, but stress and anxiety can spiral you, making it difficult for you to continue your daily activities. Often the lines drawn between the work and personal space become blurry as one tries to escape reality. It is a life-changing event that can affect your mental and overall health. It is good to have support from others, such as parents, friends, etc., during this challenging phase.

Divorce Starts with Filing

Every divorce starts with filing the petition and ends with the final judgment. One can file for divorce in person or online and start the legal process of ending the marriage. The divorce filing fee varies from state to state and often from county to county; nationwide, they typically range from $100 to $350, but in some, it can go up to more than $400. If both spouses agree on the petition and matters involving property, children, or other issues, it is called an uncontested divorce. However, if the party that received the petition didn’t agree to the demands, they would reject it and file a response with the court, called a contested divorce. In a contested divorce, a professional family law attorney is required to proceed with the case. And when the case goes on trial, and if both parties do not agree with each other over matters like child custody and spousal support, it is likely extended.

Contested Divorce can be Costly

No matter how simple you keep your divorce, you may spend a lot to get through it. However, it may only sometimes be the case where the party must pay a hefty amount to get through the divorce. According to the research, an average of $7000 is spent on a divorce, but this is not one-size-fits-all. Remember, it may not be the same for every couple and may vary in states. For instance, it can become further complicated if the stakes are high and both parties share assets. Whereas uncontested divorces are much simpler, and some don’t even opt for an attorney and do all the research on their own before moving ahead and signing the documents. Often court fee influences your overall amount the hourly court session fee, attorney’s fee, administrative fee, etc. If you are undergoing a divorce and trying to do it yourself, seeking the help of a professional family law attorney can help your case. We may ensure that you receive whatever you deserve and is in your best interests. So, schedule an appointment with Shaffer Family Law at (480) 470-3030 today.